Yes, You *Do* Need A 12-Foot Skeleton In Your Front Yard This Halloween

Decorating for Halloween has never been more fun. Retailers are constantly outdoing themselves with even more ridiculous and over-the-top decorations, and I think 2020 really calls for it. I mean, why not put out a 12-foot skeleton from Home Depot this year?

This giant, glowing eyed Bone Daddy from Home Depot's Home Accents collection will set you back a cool $300, but considering the fact that it's as tall as many houses — and 6 feet across — it was never going to be an economical Halloween decoration. It's designed to make a statement, and what that statement is, only you can decide. Maybe you have him hold a sign that reads "ate all my veggies in life." Maybe you find her a saucy king-sized sheet to wear as a toga, fashion a hat from a large straw basket, and have her recline under a tree, ready to pass out candy. Maybe you just use it to scare away the horrors of 2020. But no matter how you use this 12-foot skeleton, people are going to remember it, so make it good.

If you are really flush with cash, you could buy two of them, and they could be BFFs and get into all sorts of shenanigans in your front yard. Think about it. They could be laid out with empty bottles in their hands like they'd gone on a bender. They could sit cross legged, playing a giant board game. they could even be holding your political signs given the time of year.

Be warned, though. It's powered by C batteries, which you know you don't have, so pick up a few packs when you're at Home Depot.

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I imagine getting it home will be an absolute trip. I'm picturing driving through town with a huge, bent up skeleton in the back of my SUV, hands hanging out the window beside my dog's face, riding through New York City. It would be totally worth it to have him perched on my rooftop, overlooking Brooklyn.