My oldest son has this rule; if I laugh at some horrible thing he does he's off the hook. Because he's figured something out about my parenting style that he shouldn't have been able to detect. Most of the time my stern visage is all smoke and mirrors. I'm trying to be mad about things I should probably be mad about if I want them to turn out OK. But, unlike this dad who got real about being "fake" in front of his kids, I tend to break character all the time. So kudos to this guy for holding it together.
An anonymous dad was interviewed on Monday for the popular social media project, Humans of New York, and he decided to use this considerable platform to get deep about his parenting style. As he told Humans of New York, he is moderately concerned that his "kids are going to be shocked when they become adults and learn that I’ve basically been playing a character for their entire lives." And he's not talking about playing the Terminator or some role in a movie, by the way. He's talking about playing a character so many of us parents find ourselves playing... that of the strict parent.
This shockingly honest dad went on to say that he's a pretty "laid back guy" who doesn't care much if beds get made or walls get scratched up. But he's aware that he has a character to play, and that character "has expectations;"
He says what he means and he does what he says. My character hates video games. He barely allows them in the house. And he’ll banish them immediately when rules are broken. But I actually play Mario Kart all the time when they’re at school.
Here's the thing about becoming a parent; you don't just magically stop being the same imperfect you that you were before you had kids. If you're anything like me, you still want to eat junk food and watch too much TV and sleep in and stuff. Which is why you need to devise a character who enforces consequences for all of those things you might not think are a big deal. Just like this dad, who told Humans of New York that his "character" threatened the kids that he would throw out their candy if they continued to wrestle. When they continued, he had to follow through and sort of hated it. But he did what had to be done. And fished the good candy out of the garbage to eat later himself.
This man's story about being a "fake" dad has gotten loads of responses from other parents who are in the same boat.
I love this. Parenting explained at its best. Another great moment of real life captured.
sounds like me as a parent. You are not alone... 😂😂
how good is this! Who even are we when we’re parenting tiny humans!?!
I'm not about to make any judgment calls here. After all, who am I to decide if this is the "right" way to parent or not?
All I know is this dad's description of playing a character as a parent rings truer to me than anything I've read in a long time. And now I'll try harder not to break character when my kids are inappropriate.
After a very frustrating first birth experience, this Deaf mother wanted a change. Will the help of two Deaf doulas give the quality communication and birth experience this mom wants and deserves? Watch Episode Four of Romper's Doula Diaries, Season Two, below, and visit Bustle Digital Group's YouTube page for more episodes.