Once, I came across a pamphlet for women in England during the Victorian Era. In it, the author told readers that if you want an attractive child, your sex must not be "faintly or drowsily performed." Can't have that, can we? But here's the thing about pregnancy sex — it's not always easy. So what sex positions are safe during the first three months of pregnancy, even if they are drowsily performed? (To be honest, during the first trimester, my husband was lucky we had sex at all, and it was probably at least somewhat faintly performed.)
According to the Mayo Clinic, sex is actually really safe for most women during their pregnancies. Unless you're diagnosed with a problem that would preclude you from having sex, like previous history of multiple miscarriages or a placental issue, your doctor will likely give you the go ahead to keep up with your sex life, however active or inactive you'd like it to be.
There are real benefits for having sex during pregnancy as well. The first thing is that sex has been found to have a real, psychological impact, according to Healthline. People who have regular sex are found to be happier, more well-adjusted people in general. That doesn't mean that if you're not feeling into it that getting down with your partner will be some sort of panacea for all that ails you, but the endorphins and dopamine released with sex and orgasm can perk you up a bit. Also, according to a study in the Journal of Reproductive Immunology, frequent pregnancy sex can lower your risk of preeclampsia by adjusting your body to your partner's DNA.
But, what positions are safe during the first three months of pregnancy?
According to the University of Pittsburgh School of Health Sciences, whatever you're comfortable with is fine. In the first three months of pregnancy, you'll likely be sore, sleepy, and queasy. If reverse cowgirl makes you feel like Wonder Woman for a few minutes, go for it. While inverted and upright positions may increase your nausea, your baby is really deep in its protective cocoon inside your uterus at this point, and isn't going to notice if you've decided to try the wheel barrow position on Wednesday and the fighting clam on Friday.
The only thing the Mayo Clinic really warned against is having your partner blow air forcefully on or around your vagina during oral sex. Your capillaries are more open when you're pregnant, closer to the surface, and their blood volume is greatly increased. Therefore, you're at greater risk of an air embolism, which is a rare, but deadly complication.
However, as far as what positions are safe for the first three months of pregnancy, it's reliant on your comfort and level of desire. If you're up to it, and your doctor says it's OK, experiment and see what feels best and is most comfortable for you and your partner. (Because no one wants to stop midway for a puke break. It's a real mood killer.)