Every woman experiences pregnancy differently. Actually, even the same woman is likely to experience different pregnancies in totally different ways. The
ways a body changes while pregnant is incredible, but it's not always super comfortable. Actually, for a lot of women, there are some very real moments of misery during those nine (OK, ten) long months.
I consider myself to have been a pretty awful pregnant woman. My attitude was atrocious and I have a deep and burning hatred for rules that made coping with the cautions of pregnancy a giant pain in my giant, pregnant ass. I was huge and miserable and sweaty and an emotional basket case. It was, all around, just a horrible, cranky look for me. In my defense — not that pregnant women should ever need to defend being slightly hot-mess-erific while gestating human life, I had some complications that made my time carrying my son not so great. Regardless, being pregnant in undoubtedly challenging, no matter what your specific challenges are.
Though I was certain that my pregnancy would never end, it did (as all pregnancies do). Even though I wasn't shy about sharing my disgruntlement during those nine months, I've got to admit that once it was all said and done, there were aspects of my pregnancy that I actually
missed. I know, I'm as surprised as you are. But honestly, you might find yourself realizing that you didn't hate nearly as much about being pregnant as you might remember. Those First Kicks
That first kick is weird, yes. But once your body is accustomed to the alien inside you, those kicks produce the most amazing feelings imaginable. Watching your belly flip and flop uncontrollably is more entertaining than Netflix, but feeling a little human perform acrobatics inside you is literally the most unreal feeling ever. I don't care about all the amazing sex you've had, or the best cheesecake you've ever eaten (well, I mean, I
care and obviously want to hear about both later) — those little kicks are irreplaceable. Food Never Tasted Better Hannah Westmoreland Murphy
Doughnuts and tacos and club sandwiches, oh my! Food literally has never tasted as good as it did when I was pregnant. Everything — even eggplant! — tasted amazing. I'll always love food, but I'm not sure I'll ever love it that hard.
Pregnant Sleep Is The Best. Sleep. Ever.
There's got to be a reason a reason that pregnant women sometimes say they experience the best sleep of their lives. It's probably because for a very limited few weeks pregnant women are so exhausted that they could literally fall asleep during a colonoscopy. Of course, this comes after the nausea, and before the bowling ball that grows inside of your stomach is so big that you can hardly find a comfortable position to sleep in at all... But somewhere in between all of that is the
best sleep you will ever sleep. The Glowing Skin, You Guys! It's Real! I Mean, It's Mostly Sweat, But Whatever!
There will come a day when beauty companies will patent the hormones (or, you know, bottle the sweat) that makes pregnant women look like goddesses. Seriously, "The Glow" is a real thing and it's amazing. After you've possibly battled off a case of severe teenage-style acne, The Glow will eventually find you. Exhaustion and dehydration will track you down postpartum, which gives women all the more reason to relish in their temporary epidermal perfection.
The Thick, Shiny Hair
Hormones might relentlessly bring about unwelcome struggles, but the magic that they work on our hair while we're pregnant almost makes up for the fact that they turn us into psychotic zombies sometimes. Seriously, pregnant hair is
the best. It's thick and shiny and voluminous. It's runway-worthy in every sense of the word (and it's also completely unfair that this pumped-up hair doesn't stick around postpartum). Leggings Were Always Acceptable To Wear As Pants
Whoever made the rule that leggings can't be pants has obviously never had a child, and needs to be reprimanded accordingly. Leggings are a pregnant girl's best friend.
The Intoxicating Excitement
Growing a person inside you is kind of a big deal, especially if it's your first time when every part of the
pregnancy experience is new. Knowing that there's a person with a completely clean slate growing inside you feels like nothing that can possibly be accurately described. A child is a fresh start, and knowing that you've got the chance to positively impact someone's life in such a huge way actually impacts your own in the most marvelous of ways. The Scanner Used To Register For Gifts Was Seriously Empowering Oh my God, you guys. Scanning every single item at Target was the most empowering experience of my life. For, like, 30 minutes I pretty much owned that store, and that was one of the most amazing feelings of my life...until I realized that registering for throw pillows for my baby shower was not a socially acceptable thing to do, and had to reel it in... BUT UNTIL THEN, I WAS QUEEN. You Basically Are The Queen
For a solid nine months, I never once opened a door for myself, and I was constantly escorted to my car by the oh-so-polite grocery store employees with my many unnecessary purchases. Blessed. So blessed.
The Excitement Of Complete Strangers
Even though that little bump made us vomit for months, maybe gave us hemorrhoids, and probably gifted us with these awesome tiger stripes across our midsection, it sure did merit a lot of positive vibes. Everyone (mostly everyone, I'm assuming, but I'm no scientist) loves a pregnant woman. And although during the couple of months that our bump was still cute and reasonably sized (rather than massive and terrifying, as it became later), everyone from the mailman to the teller at the bank wanted to smile at our bellies (and hopefully keep their hands to themselves), the good energy and encouraging smiles sure were worth it.
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