While I’m careful not to let our calendar get so full we end up not enjoying any of it, it’s nice to have so many options. Celebrating in different ways, with different groups of people, is what makes this season (in a place like my home of New York City) really special for me. I love that my kids get to experience this holiday variety.

Since we celebrate both holidays — with food, family, and gifts — we don’t go all out with any of it. For many, it seems Christmas is the highlight of the year and for others it can be the absolute worst. For us, since we have Chanukah too, we don’t up the stakes too much with holidays in general. Keeping expectations low and not throwing extravagant gatherings or holing up in the kitchen cooking for days on end, is a way we get to enjoy it all.

The second night of Chanukah coincides with Christmas, so we’re having my (all Jewish) family over to our place. It’s so nice not to have competing invitations for the holidays, and to be able to spend it with our families in ways that make (most) everyone happy. Of course, you can't please everyone all of the time, but we come close.

We actually have never done this, since my husband’s family lives several hours from us in multiple directions. However, in theory we could totally have a goyim celebration as we light the Menorah, serve latkes, and bet our Chanukah gelt as we spin the dreidel.

It’s just fun to say, even if it’s not actually a thing. If you get a toddler to try to say it, it’s pretty amazing.

Sharing our Christmas and Jewish celebrations with our kids is a way they are learning that there are many different ways to honor their heritage. While we go about our celebrations pretty much the same way — food, family, and lights — it’s good for our children to know that they are two distinct holidays, with very different backstories.

Being able to celebrate both holidays, since my husband was raised Catholic, means I get my tree and my lights without feeling like I’m faking the holiday. We still have a menorah and dreidels, but I get to enjoy the vestiges of Christmas without cheating on my own upbringing.

I remember my mother being frustrated that the options for Chanukah-themed gift wrap were so limited. Now, if I find some, it’s fine, but if I use Christmas-themed wrap, it’s all good, too. Truly, I prefer the secular designs depicting winter scenes. But now, if I absolutely had to wrap a gift with Santa paper, our interfaith family can pull it off.

Spinning dreidels, singing carols; it all applies to us. Growing up Jewish in a predominantly Christian society, I never really felt I was part of the holiday season, since it skewed towards Christmas. Now that Christmas is as much a part of our seasonal celebrations as Chanukah is, I love that I get a chance, and that my kids have the opportunity, to participate in all kinds of festivities and feel represented by them.

Since we’re not religious, we pick and choose the parts of the holidays that feel most applicable to how we live our lives and the values we want to impart to our kids. Exchanging gifts? Yes. Making elaborate meals requiring days of kitchen prep? No. Donating time, money, and goods to those in need? Yes. Attending services? No. This Christmas Day, which coincides with Chanukah, we are serving latkes and lots of appetizers from the freezer section of Trader Joe’s. There will be something edible (or quaffable) with cranberries. Our fake tree will be lit, our velcro menorah will have two candles attached, and we’ll be feeling so fortunate that we are celebrating our holidays in our own ways, in our own home, with not too many people (because headaches are not part of the plan).

Happy holidays! (Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, Happy Kwanzaa. Or any combination of the three.)