Christmas trees are for the birds. Seriously. Now, before you call me a Scrooge or tell me how I am ruining my kids' childhood, hear me out. There are plenty of completely legitimate reasons why I refuse to get a Christmas tree and surprisingly, none of them have anything to do with hating Christmas or ruining Christmas for my kids.
I've never really liked Christmas trees. Even as a child. They are messy, smelly, and time consuming, and take a lot of work to obtain and maintain. Plus, they cost money, which is something we don't have a lot of and, if we did, we sure as heck wouldn't spend it on an over-priced decoration that is only good for a few weeks, will potentially burn down our house, and will inevitably make a huge mess. You may think that I feel this way because I am not a Christian. Meh. Christmas trees aren't either. Don't believe me? Google that sh*t.
But, I digress.
"What about the children? Please, think of the children!" You mean the kids that'll inevitably mess with any tree I bring home? The ones who manage to break ornaments, knock the tree down, or get crushed by it? Well, Christmas trees are both dangerous and unbelievably alluring to children, so I am thinking of them. I'm thinking that bringing a tree covered in shiny, electric glass into our home is a seriously bad idea. So, before you write me off as a no fun, terrible mom, I assure you I have very legitimate reasons for not getting a Christmas tree, including the following: