Although a day spent golfing and goofing off with the kids might sound ideal for Dad, it might not match how he envisioned the day. “Don’t assume what he’d like to do,” dating and relationship coach Fran Greene, LCSW tells Romper. “Your elaborate plan may be your vision but not his.” If you're not sure how he wants to spend the day, just talk to him about it. Getting it right is more important than surprising him with a (potentially unwanted) gift.

When you’re in a relationship and have kids, you get so used cheering them on and giving them special treats that you can forget to do the same for each other. “Do something that lets him know that you are his biggest cheerleader,” says Green. “It can be as simple as warming his towels before his shower, or having his favorite food treats appear all day." It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it’s something unexpected that he enjoys.

Father’s Day isn’t just for your partner, but for his dad, too. “Be supportive if your partner wants to see his Dad, and or grandfather in addition to spending time with you and his children," says Green. If your honey wants to spend some time with his dad (or someone who has been like a dad to him), be sure to help facilitate that. It might mean including his dad in on your Dad Day activities, or even having your kiddos create a card for their grandpa.

There’s nothing like looking at old photos to elicit those warm fuzzy feelings. “Create a photo album memorializing your partner’s experiences with the children from early years to present honors him as father and acknowledges his relationship with the kids,” Babita Spinelli, LP, a psychotherapist, tells Romper. You might opt to make an actual album — or even just put some pics on his computer for him to click through.

Sure, in theory, Father’s Day should be spent with the kiddos. But even dads need a break from their favorite little people too, sometimes (remember how you felt on Mother's Day?). “You might just giving him a day off from parenting!” says Spinelli. You can still have a special family meal at the end of the day so the kids can celebrate their dad.

“Start his day off with a special experience,” says Spinelli. (Not that kind, but that could work, too.) “It could be anything from a morning cup of coffee in bed with his favorite paper to his favorite omelette.” Then take it one step further: “Buy him an online class that you know he would be interested in but might never purchase on his own because he may see it as a luxury item,” she says. He'll remember the day forever.

Somewhere in between carpooling kiddos around and getting your picky toddler to eat, it’s easy to forget to focus on your feelings. That’s why, on Father’s Day, you can take the time to show your sweetie what he really means. “Write a letter about what makes him a wonderful father and recite it to him,” says Spinelli. “Include the kids to share in the experience.”

Everyone communicates differently, and Dad is no different. But once you tune in to how he expresses himself, then you can figure out how to make him feel special on Father’s Day. “The key to communicating how special he is should begin with using his love language,” says Coleman. “For instance, a focus on gift-giving may not be what says ‘I love you’ to him like performing special acts of service, giving him extra quality time, or showering him with physical touch, or words of affirmation.” When you understand what really resonates with him, then you can make Father’s Day even more fantastic.

With kids crying, complaining, and pulling on you at every turn, sex can sometimes become an unwitting victim of your relationship. But if the mood strikes and the feelings are right, having a roll in the hay isn’t the worst way to kick off Father’s Day. “Early morning sex kick starts your day off with you both on the same page,” Dr. Fran Walfish, Psy.D., a family and relationship expert in Beverly Hills, tells Romper in an email. “Physically (sexually) connecting puts you immediately into an emotional connection.” So take advantage of your kids’ snoozing to start smooching... and other things.

“When your husband moans that he wishes he could give the kids more one-one-one attention, offer to care for the other kids while he spends solo dinner time with only Daddy,” says Dr. Walfish. “Your kids will love Dad’s individual attention and company.” If you have more than one kid, schedule the day so he gets individual time to do something fun with each child (and plan the activities for him so he's not stuck scratching his head).

Whether your guy is a grill master or couldn’t figure out how to use a frying pan to save his life, give him the day off from cooking by planning meals that he’ll love for his special day. “Cook or order in a special meal full of foods he’ll enjoy and are celebratory,” Beth Sonnenberg, LCSW, a relationship expert, tells Romper.

It might be sports memorabilia or Star Wars movie posters. Whatever your guy is collecting, help him out by tracking down a coveted addition to his stash. “Buying a gift that adds to his collection, or tools or clothes related to a hobby he may have can make your partner feel understood,” says Sonnenberg. Just make sure that it’s not something for the house (like paint for a DIY project that you want him to do), or something that totally benefits the kids.

“One of the most important things we can do for our hubby on Father’s Day is to express our gratitude,” Suzie Pileggi Pawelski, well-being expert and co-author of Happy Together: Using the Science of Positive Psychology to Build Love that Lasts, tells Romper. “Research suggests that gratitude is key for relational well-being because it makes people feel cared for, loved, and understood.” So in the quiet moments of Father’s Day, sit down with your sweetie and just let him know how much he means to you. Even though he probably already knows, hearing it can be so meaningful.

While it might be fun to plan a big shindig for your sweetie, doing something simple can have the biggest impact. Maybe it’s just letting him sleep in — for once — without the kids climbing all over him. “Show your love through small acts of kindness,” says Pawelski. “It’s important to realize it’s the small things, not grandiose gestures, that we do every day that add up over time to make the biggest impact.”

Father’s Day can be a great opportunity to create new traditions, both for you as a couple as well as a family, that celebrate Dad every single day.

Experts:

Toni Coleman, LCSW

Fran Greene, LCSW

Babita Spinelli, LP

Dr. Fran Walfish, Psy.D.