Romper

8 Things Parents Just Can't Hide From Smart Kids, No Matter How Hard They Try

There are some things in life that are just better left unsaid or unseen, especially when it comes to our kids. Their focus should be on finger painting and jumping in puddles and learning the ABCs, not the issues we face as adults. For that reason, there's a lot of things parents try to hide from their kids. This is typically an innocent and very achievable act, but not when you've got a miniature genius on your hands because, well, nothing gets past a supremely smart kid. Nothing.

There are some things you just can't hide from your kids, no matter how hard you try. This is especially true with kids who are a bit more advanced intellectually (all kids will get there eventually, some just move a little quicker), as they seem to always be on alert or just innately intuitive. Smart kids like to make messes and throw tantrums and refuse vegetables just like any normal kid does, only they're observing the cause and effect of their actions (and the actions around them) more vigilantly. There are times when having a super smart toddler is kind of a nightmare for parents, especially when we're trying to hide something from them or at least keep them from worrying about, you know, adult stuff.

The lies all moms tell their kids at some point are usually innocent and told with good intentions, but a smart kid catches on to those little white lies a lot quicker than most, and when they do, they will out you. So, if you've got a smart kid, just save yourself the embarrassment and don't even bother trying to hide the following eight things from them, because they will figure you out.

The Vegetables Hidden In Their Dinner

Giphy

Trying to feed a picky eater will often result in parents having to "Trojan horse" their kids' supper time. What does it mean "Trojan horse" supper time, exactly? It means burying vegetables or other healthy things that your kids refuse to eat underneath a pile of cheese or bread in an attempt to get some extra nutrition in your kid's diet. Parents don't get away with this for long, if at all, if they've got a super smart kid because they're suspicious of any changes they notice on their plate. And yes, they will notice that lump of green underneath all of that melted cheese.

The Truth About Santa, The Tooth Fair, Easter Bunny, Or Any Other Fictional Character

Giphy

Parents of smart kids can only get away with the lies about Santa, the tooth fairy, Easter bunny, and any other fictional character for a very limited amount of time. Their kids might buy their BS at first, but the mythical tales of a man riding in a sleigh full of toys, driven by reindeer, across the world in one night is going to spark their curiosity. They're going to have questions for that jolly old elf, and they will eventually compile a plan to catch him. They'll probably concoct a plan to stay up late and meet Santa himself and, well, when they catch you eating the cookies and drinking the milk, the jig is up.

Being Lazy

Being a parent is exhausting, so it's understandable that a person raising little humans would get a bit lazy from time to time. That's fine, and completely normal, but when a smart kid notices that their mom has been completely unproductive while laying on the couch all day, even after they've requested her presence at their tea party, they're going to put two and two together, and they're not going to be happy about it. You won't be able to pass of laying on the couch as "sitting and thinking about important stuff," so you might as well get in that damn tea room and drink that damn tea.

When Something Goes Missing

Giphy

Trying to kidnap a smart kid's favorite stuffed animal in order to scrub the peanut butter and jelly out of its fur requires a stealth that rivals that of a spy. Smart kids keep tabs of the things that are most important to them, so if their favorite bunny is missing, they're definitely going to notice. And no, they won't believe you when you tell them that their bunny is on vacation or out to lunch.

When They Catch You In A Lie

Giphy

We all tell our kids little white lies at some point, but super smart kids are aware of their surroundings pretty much all the time. They're the most absorbent little sponges you will ever come across. They're constantly taking mental notes of their routines and the behavior of those around them. So unless you've got a good poker face, your smart kid is going to figure out that broccoli doesn't actually taste all that great and that it won't actually make them immediately sprout muscles.

How Babies Are Made

The stork story doesn't work on smart kids for the same reason that the Santa story doesn't. A smart kid is going to want to meet this "baby delivering bird," and when they don't, well, you're going to have to come up with a version of "the birds and the bees" that's suitable for toddlers.

What You're Really Drinking

Giphy

You can only tell a smart kid that you're drinking "mommy's special drink" for so long before they figure out that it's actually a routine part of mommy's night and what's "special" about it, is alcohol. Kids usually want to mirror their parents, so if their parents get a cool and shiny glass of some sort of red juice every night, they're going to want one, too. Eventually, you're going to have to either come clean, or come up with some elaborate story about why your kid can't drink that special juice, too.

The Harsh Realities Of The World

As parents, we all want to shield our children from the harsh realities of the world. Kids shouldn't have to worry about taxes or corruption or violence or wars but, unfortunately, there's just so much of these very unfortunate occurrences happening that avoiding them entirely is next to impossible, especially if you have an observant child. Unless you live in an underground bunker that you never leave, and unless you don't have internet access, your kid is eventually going to come across something that you'd rather not have to explain. It's sad and it's scary, and hopefully, you can be somewhat successful in preserving their innocence while helping them understand why there's so much turmoil. They will be the next generation that the news stories are about, so if we want to have any shot at changing those stories for the better, we can't hide certain realities from them, no matter how difficult it may be.