8 Thoughts Every Pregnant Woman Has When She's Puking Her Guts Out

Ad failed to load

Morning sickness is one of the most common ailments pregnant women endure in their first trimester. Many expectant mamas experience nausea by itself (which is awful, don't get me wrong), but those of us who have vomiting know how much worse it can get. It's different than throwing up from the flu or from a night of one-too-many martinis. It sucks in a singular way, and that's why every pregnant woman is thinking the same thing when she's puking her guts out.

According to the American Pregnancy Association (APA), 60-70 percent of pregnant women experience vomiting as a side effect of morning sickness. Count me among them. During my first pregnancy, it got so bad that it landed me in urgent care. I needed IV fluids to address my dehydration. It was definitely worse the first trimester, but I continued to throw up randomly throughout my pregnancy. It's not any better this time around, either. Just the other day, I found my 11 week pregnant self leaning out my car door, revisiting my breakfast in the parking lot of a dentist's office.

I can't think of an instance when throwing up feels good, but at least you usually get some relief. When you're pregnant, you just go back to feeling like hot garbage. If you're in the throes of tossing your pregnant cookies, I feel you, and I have a feeling I know what's going through your mind:

Ad failed to load

"This Can't Be Good For The Baby"


That all this vomiting will hurt the baby is a pretty common fear. I mean, how can they be getting any nutrients if you aren't? My midwife assured me, however, that baby will take what they need from mom, and she was right. According to BabyMed, vomiting normally does not harm the fetus, and in case this was on your list of worries, retching won't cause miscarriage.

However, if you get to the point where you can't keep anything (liquids or solids) down, or you're losing weight, you may have a condition called hyperemesis gravidarum. In that case, you do want to see a doctor because severe dehydration can hurt your baby.

"How Much Longer?"

I don't care which pregnancy you're on, if you have severe vomiting, you know exactly how many weeks you are. Like, I know I am 11 weeks and one day and I absolutely count that one day because it puts me that much closer to the magical 12 week mark where most women experience relief.

"Oh, God. Please Don't Let Me Pee."


Yep, so this is a thing. Not only can you leak a little when you sneeze or cough, the act of vomiting can also make you urinate. It's called stress-induced incontinence, friends, and let this voice of experience tell you that, without a single doubt, it's the goddamn worst. When I'm hunched over that porcelain bowl, I'm praying to all the gods that my pantyliner holds up.

Ad failed to load

"Did Everyone Hear That?"

It's one thing to throw up in the privacy of your own home, but public barfing is its own circle of hell. I don't know about you, but I am not a quiet puker. So when I open the bathroom door and do the Starbucks walk of shame, I just know that every patron has been listening (and judging) over their peppermint mochas.

"Gross. Splash Back."


When we were kids, my sister dared me to drink toilet water. She assured me it was sanitary because she'd just flushed and it was "fresh" water. I understand now how evil she was being. You guys, the toilet water is not clean, and this is never more evident than when you blow chunks into it only to have it splash back onto your forehead (although I won't judge you if you are momentarily refreshed).

"I Have Regrets"

Those barbecue-flavored Pringles don't look so good now, do they?

Ad failed to load

"F*ck You, Vitamin B6 & Ginger"


When you've taken preventive measures, vomiting can feel like a personal affront. I can personally take Zofran and puke 30 minutes later, so I know this to be true. There are any number of vomiting remedies you can try, so it feels extra bad when nothing works. (I'll tell you where you can stick your seasickness bands.)

"Never Again"

Holding my hair back as I lost my curry, my husband gently chided, "Just remember this next time you think you want another baby." Annoying, yes, but not wrong. We are actually capping our family at two kids because I'm not willing to do this again. I'll do it once more for this baby, but I can think of a million things I'd rather do than throw up for two straight months.

Check out Romper's new video series, Romper's Doula Diaries:

Watch full episodes of Romper's Doula Diaries on Facebook Watch.

Ad failed to load
Must Reads

8 Things That *Will* Go Wrong Every Time You Plan A Kid-Free Night

The last time my husband and I went out to dinner alone was… actually, I can’t remember. But I can count on one hand how many times I’ve seen a movie in a theater in the last year. Before we had children we used to go out all the time. But even with …
By Liza Wyles

These Photos Of North West Then & Now Will Take You On A Sweet Trip Down Memory Lane

When Kim Kardashian welcomed her first daughter, North West, with her husband, Kanye West, in 2013, her whole life was changed. The social media and reality TV star became a mom for the first time and her Instagram presence took a very adorable turn.…
By Casey Suglia

11 Photos You *Must* Take During The Last Days Of Your Pregnancy

During my first pregnancy, I took a photo each week to document my growing belly. I stopped around 36 weeks, though. I hated how I looked in those pictures, and didn't think I'd want to relive those moments. I was wrong. My second pregnancy was a dum…
By Steph Montgomery

This Is What It Means If Your Pregnancy Test Changes Overnight

The time between when a woman suspects she might be pregnant and when it is confirmed for sure is the longest of her life. Regardless of whether you are hoping for a positive or a negative result, the odds are good that you are sweating bullets when …
By Shannon Evans

6 Red Flags To Definitely Look Out For After Your Baby Falls

The first time my infant son tried to take a few steps, he tumbled and bumped his head on the coffee table. My blood turned to ice in my veins and I froze. There truly isn't anything quite like the feeling a parent gets when their little one gets hur…
By Sarah Bunton

These 9 Instant Pot Recipes Will Make Even The Pickiest Eater Happy At The Table

Like any parent, I've had my share of parenting hits and misses, but one of my favorite "wins" is my daughter's diverse palate. I don't even know if I can take credit for it, but I would like to think I had something to do with her love for lentils, …
By Caroline Shannon-Karasik

Turns Out, Kim Kardashian's Favorite Mom Products Look A Lot Like Your Own Faves

Being a mom is really hard work, especially for the first few months, and Kim Kardashian West is no different in that regard. Now the mother of three, Kardashian says that there are a few products she just can't live without when it comes to raising …
By Abi Berwager Schreier

Soda Might Hurt Your Fertility, Study Says, & Here's What You Can Do

Who doesn't love sugary drinks? I stopped drinking soda years ago, but I still love gulping down those fancy Starbucks coffee beverages. I don't have a big sweet tooth, but I am a sucker for sugar-sweetened beverages every now-and-then. Turns out, th…
By Annamarya Scaccia

10 Things No One Tells You About Having A Baby In Your 30s

If you're like me, you evaluate the pros and cons of any major life decision. When my husband and I were considering starting a family, I thought about my career, education, and financial stability. I wanted to know how a pregnancy and childbirth wou…
By Steph Montgomery

This Woman Thought She Had An Eyelash Stuck In Her Eye. Then It Moved.

I'm not a person who is easily icked out. As a kid, I collected bugs and thought I was going to be an entomologist and asked Santa Claus for ant farms and nets to catch bees. I'm still super curious about anything that flies and crawls, which might s…
By Karen Fratti

5 Red Flags Your Toddler Isn't Eating Enough

Toddlers are notoriously picky eaters, at least in my experience. You offer mashed potatoes, they want french fries. You give them crackers, they scream for chips. It's frustrating, to be sure, but it's usually their way of vying for independence. It…
By Candace Ganger

11 Ways Your Pregnancy Will Be Different If You Have A Boy Vs A Girl

If you've been pregnant before, you might start comparing your previous pregnancies to that of your current pregnancy. A lot of things can change from pregnancy to pregnancy, based on a whole host of different factors (including how well you remember…
By Lauren Schumacker

35 Moms Share The Most Disgusting Things Their Husbands Do

I'm a human being who revels in challenges. I like when people present me with one, especially if they don't think I can meet or succeed it, and I like taking a challenge on, especially if it's unexpected. So when I aimed to uncover the most disgusti…
By Jamie Kenney

How Having Kids In Your 20s Affects You Later In Life

For parents, like myself, who had kids in their 20s, there are a number of questions that come to mind. When you're deciding what your future will look like, you'll likely consider what this means for your health, career, and more down the line. Thin…
By Tessa Shull

12 Moms Share How They Stay Healthy During Flu Season

Unfortunately, we're in the middle of the roughest flu seasons in recent memory. And we’re not totally out of the woods, either. People around the country are still getting the flu, and, sadly, some of them are having to be hospitalized due to flu-re…
By Priscilla Blossom

8 "Mistakes" I'm Glad I Made During My First Pregnancy

As an adult, I've learned you never really stop hating being told what to do. When I was pregnant I was getting instructions at every turn, from doctors, relatives, and complete strangers on the subway. I would nod and smile but then go about making …
By Liza Wyles

Study: Drinking Two Glasses Of Wine A Day Is Good For Your Mind — Here's Why

There’s more scientific proof that a daily drink or two isn't necessarily a bad thing and could have a place in an overall healthy lifestyle. A new study out of the University of Rochester Medical Center (URMC) in New York found that — in mice, at le…
By Tiffany Thomas

Research Says Eating Carbs Can Lead To A Healthy Pregnancy, So Bring On The Pasta

In the world of me, no food is better than bread. I know it's supposed to be pretty terrible for you, high in calories, low in protein, and full of that modern-day demon, gluten... but guys, it's really yummy. Especially warm out of the oven, when th…
By Jen McGuire

These Photos Of Prince George Then & Now Will Give You Serious Baby Fever

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are expecting their third child in Spring 2018. With all of the excitement surrounding the new baby, it's easy to forget all of the good times that have already passed. The couple's eldest is already well into the sc…
By Azure Hall

This Is, Hands Down, The *Grossest* Thing Babies Do Inside The Womb

Your baby's life in the womb may be safe and warm, but it's also kind of grody. Seriously, the whole process of growing into a human being includes more than a few icky moments along the way. But this is the grossest thing babies do inside the womb b…
By Lindsay E. Mack