After spending an unreasonable portion of my childhood staying up late to watch Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher as Jackie and Kelso, it's almost surreal to see their relationship progress in real life. The two have come far from their early days portraying an on-again-off-again relationship and pranking fellow celebrities on Punk'd, having tied the knot in 2015 themselves. In addition to still making up the majority of my guilty-pleasure television, Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher's parenting quotes are endlessly adorable and so real.
For anyone who doesn't know, the couple has two children together: daughter Wyatt Isabelle Kutcher, born in 2014, and son Dimitri Portwood Kutcher, born in 2016. They actually began dating in in 2012, six years after That 70's Show had ended, and became engaged 2014. They married soon after, tying the knot in July of 2015, according to People.
Having two young kids pretty close in age can be difficult, but the couple seems to enjoy discussing their kids. And it's a good thing, because the stories they share are great! Whenever the topic of parenting and family comes up, Kunis and Kutcher manage to bring a level of realness to the conversation that every parent can appreciate.
Like That Time Ashton Kutcher Discussed Changing Tables In Men's Rooms
It's a common topic of complaint that men's restrooms are typically lacking something important: changing tables.
For couples who can't use, or don't feel comfortable in, the women's restroom, it makes taking care of a child unnecessarily difficult. And beyond that, it continues to set up caring for a baby as solely a woman's responsibility.
On his digital media site A+, as The Washington Post reported, Kutcher wrote:
I would like my daughter to experience a world where gender doesn’t dictate one’s responsibility or limit one’s opportunity. Having changing tables in men’s rooms is just a tiny step in the process of rectifying legacy gender discrimination. Men who are aware of this bias want to participate equally in the child care process, and our society should support that. It’s time to get our hands dirty.
Real talk and props to him!
Or When Mila Kunis Talked About Not Letting Loose Like She Used To
My younger siblings accuse my mom of being boring when she dreams about having the house to herself so she can listen to not-so-radio friendly versions of her songs. But, letting loose takes on a new definition when you have kids, as Kunis shared with Entertainment Tonight:
I can let loose as much as I want, but at 6:45 in the morning, she’s awake and so am I. [She doesn’t] care if I let loose the night before, so I can only let loose so much, to be honest I don’t know what letting loose means. Probably not going to sleep at 9:30!
When The Couple Agreed Not To Have A Nanny...
Back when Baby Wyatt was just a newborn, Kutcher discussed what it was like having a new baby on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, revealing that the couple elected not to have a nanny to help. According to People, he said:
We just want to know our kid. We want to be the people that know what to do when the baby’s crying to make the baby not cry anymore. We want to know, like, when she makes a little face or something, we want to be emotionally in touch with her. And I think the only way to do that is by being the one who’s there.
...And When He Compared Babies To Cell Phones
In the same interview with DeGeneres, Kutcher made the realest comment of all when discussing what it was like to have a new baby. According to People, he said:
It's like getting a new cell phone where all the features don't work yet. It's like a phone that doesn't take pictures. It's like, why doesn't my new phone take pictures? And it won't take calls; it doesn't do a lot. But it looks really cute!
And Mila Kunis Shared The Same Sentiment Later
Later, with Dimitri, Kunis echoed the same sentiments that her husband shared with DeGeneres. According to an interview with E! News, she said:
My not-even-1-year-old, he's a lump of meat. Like, I love him, but he's, you know, 10 months old.
Babies are cute, but it's true. They don't do a lot and, as parents, we love them for it anyway.
When Mila Kunis Had An Important Point For New Dads
Who can forget back in 2014, when Kunis, pregnant herself, unleashed the most important rant and reminder to new dads? While appearing on Jimmy Kimmel Live!, she said:
You’re not pregnant! Do you have to squeeze a watermelon-sized person out of your lady-hole? No. Are you crying alone in your car listening to a stupid Bette Midler song? No. When you wake up and throw up, is it because you’re nurturing a human life? No. It’s because you had too many shots of tequila. Do you know how many shots of tequila we had? None.
So to any dad considering that "We're pregnant" announcement: maybe think about rephrasing it.
When Ashton Kutcher Pointed Out Babies' Durability
No matter what, the first time doing anything is largely an experiment. Confusing, frazzling, and eye-opening. Usually, the second time around yields slightly better results, as Kutcher once told Jimmy Fallon, according to People:
The first one, I almost became a doula. I was reading every book. I was ready. I had like a catcher’s mitt on. This one, I haven’t done anything. I’m like, "Well, we didn’t break the first one." They’re really durable — that’s what you realize. They don’t break very easily.
When Mila Kunis Said She Wouldn't Trade Her Kids For Anything
Despite the boring stages, the early mornings with incredibly late nights, and altogether confusion that can come with raising children, Kunis shared what most parents know. She told Entertainment Tonight:
I would never trade it for [anything]. Ever ever. But I know that when we decided to have a kid, we were ready to no longer be selfish – at least start the process. Because innately, as humans, we’re very selfish people, and we really wanted to have a family.
Kutcher and Kunis clearly have the whole parenting thing down and let's hope they keep on sharing their oh so relatable, sometimes hilarious, words on wisdom.
Check out Romper's new video series, Bearing The Motherload, where disagreeing parents from different sides of an issue sit down with a mediator and talk about how to support (and not judge) each other’s parenting perspectives. New episodes air Mondays on Facebook.