morrowlight/Shutterstock

Your Ultimate Mom Weakness, Based On Your Zodiac Sign

Share

Astrology — the mystical art of determining a person's personality and destiny by calculating the position of heavenly bodies — is thousands of years old. And, as a true Capricorn, I'm here for it... as long as it's taken with a grain of salt. Capricorns are skeptics, after all. But I think it's a lot of fun to think about things from a new perspective using ancient archetypes. And when it comes to parenting, I think it's helpful to be aware of our struggles and our weaknesses So what is your ultimate mom weakness, according to your Zodiac?

First things first: remember that grain of salt? Yeah, pay attention to that. Because not only is Astrology in no way shape or form a science or, as far as we know, based in any kind of reality (#SkepticalCapricorn), even if you're someone who believes in the immutable power and authority of the Zodiac (#TraditionalCapricorn), one's sun sign — which is what we usually think of as our "sign" — is only one component in an Astrological reading. There are also moon signs and rising signs, all of which converge to paint a more complex picture than "a Leo is vain!" and "a Sagittarius is flaky!"

So, with measured expectation, but in the spirit of good fun, let's take a look at what you can expect to struggle with as a mom, based on what the stars were up to when you were born:

Aries (March 21 — April 19): Walking Away From A Challenge

Giphy

So I'm not saying that a willingness to take on a challenge is a bad thing. It's a very good thing and will serve any parent well. But there's not backing down from a challenge and there's running headlong into one when it would be far easier to run around it and avoid it all together.

An Aries, being an Aries, will generally manage whatever they run into, but that doesn't make the experience pleasant. So, yeah, you can make your own baby food and volunteer at your older child's school twice a week and coach Little League and run your synagogue's community service board all while working a full-time job, but why? You'd do well to learn that just because you can chew it doesn't mean you have to bite it off (especially when your proverbial mouth is already full).

Taurus (April 20 — May 20): Luxury Items

This sign is calm, patient, down-to-earth, and hardworking. Taurus love hearth and home, and you'll often find them relaxing in their garden (they love the feeling of dirt in their hands) or snuggling on the couch with their babies. Unlike neighboring Aries, they don't worry about appearing "lazy." They know who they are and what they're about — they work hard, but they also chill hard with no shame.

They also believe that if they're going to work hard they deserve the best of everything in their downtime, which means Taurus can be quite materialistic and stubbornly insist upon the best of everything. They're a sucker for expensive fabrics, anything shiny (both actually shiny and metaphorically shiny), and the newest most high-tech anything. So when it comes to nursery, baby gear, etc., a Taurus mom is going to go all out.

Gemini (May 21 — June 20): Wanting To Be "Cool Mom"

Gemini are witty, social, curious, and a joy to be around. They are communicative, funny, and put a high value on fun. But, sometimes, a desire to keep things light and carefree (typical of an air sign), paired with the anxiety of not being liked (the dark side of this famously two-sided sign) can mean that a Gemini mom is a bit loose with discipline and rules. Gemini Mom doesn't want to be a buzzkill, you guys! She wants everyone to be happy! She may even want her kids to see her as a friend! Whether or not she gives into these impulses is up for debate, but she will have to fight the urge.

Cancer (June 21 — July 22): Asking For Help

Giphy

Cancer mamas are loving, imaginative, sensitive, intuitive, protective, and consciously committed to their home and family life. And maybe it's because they're so in-tune with other people's needs that they expect other people to know what they want. So Cancers can get into this vicious cycle of expecting their loved ones — partners and children included — to instinctively know what they want, getting upset when said family members aren't mind readers, getting salty about it, but then still not saying what's the matter. (They could learn a thing or two from neighboring Gemini, who talk about everything.)

Parenting doesn't work without communication, my darling little crabs! Talk to your partner ("Could you please change the baby?") and your kids ("I need you to clean up your messes!") so you're all on the same page and getting what you need.

Leo (July 23 — Aug. 22): Spoiling

Did you have that friend whose mom was, like, "the group" mom? Who would always "warn" you that she was a hugger as she hugged you, and made you laugh, and tossed a couple bucks your way so you could all go buy candy or whatever? Quintessential Leo mom, that one. Leos are big-hearted, affectionate, boisterous, and fiercely loyal. They're also extremely generous which, if they're not careful, can turn into spoiling really fast. And, what's more, they expect praise and acknowledgement for that spoiling. (Did I mention Leos can be a bit egotistical? And sometimes a lot egotistical?)

Virgo (Aug. 23 — Sept. 22): Expecting Perfection

I don't love the term "Super Mom," because I think it sets up an unfair and unrealistic expectation of mothers and motherhood. Virgos, however, are on top of it. They are organized, detail oriented, and have all their sh*t together. They don't even make a big deal of it. They're actually often more comfortable eschewing the spotlight. If Leos need to be the star of the show, then Virgos are happiest being the stage manager — they're still in charge, but behind the scenes.

Because Virgos have such mastery over their own lives and image (image is very important to a Virgo) they may find they put a lot of pressure on their children to "keep up appearances." Remember that your children are their own people, Virgo mom, and not another project that you have to complete perfectly.

Libra (Sept. 23 — Oct. 22): Pushover

Giphy

Libras are all about balance — it doesn't always come easily to them, but it's always important to them. They are peacekeepers and seekers of justice. They are fair and mild-mannered. But this desire to achieve and maintain harmony can mean that Libra moms live in fear of conflict and will do anything to avoid it. Libras have a bad habit of not picking a side and being a bit wishy-washy. A little discord is not the end of the world. You will get through it and things will be harmonious again!

Scorpio (Oct. 23 — Nov. 21): Grudges

If you have the love of a Scorpio mama, count yourself lucky. This sign is passionate and loyal to the point of, well, maybe chill a little bit, Scorpio mom. There's nothing she will not do for her babies, but here's the thing: you cross a Scorpio's sense of loyalty and you're going to have to expect the stinger, no matter who you are. That vengeance will be cold and devastating. A Scorpio will never forget a slight and, while they may (eventually) forgive (emphasis on "may") she will never forget or, for that matter, let you forget.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 — Dec. 21): Having To Wait

Carefree, adventurous, energetic, and funny, Sagittarius moms are a kid's best guide through life — they're excited to teach everything they've learned and explore nature and other cultures with their little ones. But a Sagittarius is also so excited to do and so endless energetic that having to move at a kid's speed may be difficult and frustrating for them. Parenthood is nothing if not learning how to restructure your sense of time and accomplishment (being OK with it taking 15 minutes to get out the door, for example), and a Sagittarius mom might not be too keen on that. But take a breath (maybe talk to a Taurus friend) and remember that the more time you take now with your child, the more accustomed they'll be to "Sagittarius pace" in the future!

Capricorn (Dec. 22 — Jan. 19): Going Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Giphy

Capricorns are creatures of habit. They like things a certain way ("because that's the way we've always done it!") and balk at the idea of change. Often, this stubborn goat will dig in their wee little hooves and lower their horns. And, yes, this isn't their best quality, and they probably need to work on it a bit, but bear in mind that it plays into their best qualities. Capricorns are keenly intelligent, natural leaders, great lovers and keepers of cultural and family tradition, and inclined to take a long-view. So their desire to do things "a certain way" is often because they have a plan and, trust them, they know what they're doing.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 — Feb. 18): Displays Of Affection

From day one, an Aquarius mother will respect their child's individuality, independence, and intelligence. They are compassionate and funny and wish to imbue their children with a sense of creativity and social justice. But Aquariuses are not naturally "cuddly" and may need to make an specific effort to not be physically (and emotionally) closed off. The negative side of an Aquariuses whimsical nature is that "whimsy" can be synonymous with "capricious." Aquariuses are often aloof. The have the soul of a mad scientist, approaching life with a deeply curious but somewhat detached attitude. You're not traditional in any sense, Aquarius mom, including how you live and love, but remember that sometimes your kids will need a good old fashioned snuggle.

Pisces (Feb. 19 — March 20): Confronting A Challenge

Oh, Pisces mom. Come over here for a comforting hug. The world can be a lot for your gentle, spiritual, sensitive, loving, timid soul, can't it? All these qualities make you and incredibly nurturing, loving parent, but they also make you want to curl up in a ball and cry when things get tough...

... and things will get tough and you will cry.

Pisces are the starry-eyed dreamers of the Zodiac and, as such, they can have a tendency to want to escape reality more than most people. But you really can't do that when you're a parent.Take a lesson from neighboring Aries, who never backs down from a challenge, and dust off your fins, hunker down, and see your troubles through. Yes, cry if you have to, but remember that you can do it!