I have bad news for any of you people out there who have been lightly debating about having children. They can be real creepy. Like not cute movie creepy with a side of dimples and such. Just little weirdos that put you into these positions where you have no clue how to react. Even if you're a famous comedian who has made a career out of making famous people vaguely uncomfortable. During a recent interview with Jimmy Kimmel, Zach Galifianakis said his 2-year-old son asked him the most awkward question, and honestly I nearly died laughing. Not literally, of course, but figuratively.
The Between Two Ferns actor and his wife Quinn Lundberg are parents to two little boys, a 5-year-old boy whose name they have never revealed and 2-year-old son Rufus. I'm not sure why they let the cat out of the bag with Rufus' name but stayed mum about their older son, but I guess that's their business. While the couple like to keep their life with their sons private, Galifianakis does like to share some pretty hilarious tidbits every now and then during interviews on late night talk shows. And his most recent interview on Live! With Jimmy Kimmel was especially amazing but also incredibly awkward and uncomfortable. In other words, this comedian's sweet spot.
So let me walk you through the story; it seems the Hangover actor was in the bathroom having a pee when his 2-year-old son came strolling in. Which makes sense because small children don't appear to have any concept of personal boundaries or space or privacy, in my long history as a mother of four sons. Young Rufus took one look at his poor, uncomfortable father peeing and asked in an apparently very cheerful voice:
Dad, can I touch your big penis please?
Galifianakis told Kimmel, himself a father of two small children who was laughing hysterically in sympathy, that he obviously said no but was a little confused about how to handle the situation.
Now before you judge little Rufus, please know that this is not that unusual. Small kids are pretty much always curious about anatomy, and unfortunately parents tend to be the first line of defense when it comes to awkward questions about the body, as per Kids Health. So Rufus is in good company.
It seems as though Galifianakis' kids have a bit of a history for being precocious, to be honest. Back in 2016 the comedian told Conan O'Brien about the first time his oldest son, who was then just two years old, saw his father's face on the side of a bus, as per E! News:
I didn't know what to say because I hadn't really thought about it. He goes, 'Who's that?' and I don't know why but I said, 'Oh, some idiot.' Thirty seconds later I hear him mumbling to himself, 'Some idiot.'
So there you have it, folks. Kids are either asking you inappropriate questions, invading your privacy, or calling you some idiot. Welcome to parenting.