Love Is Blind Chelsea and Kwame eat dinner with her father.
9 Parenting Lessons We Learned From Love Is Blind Season 4

*Immediately purchases a crying towel.*

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Note: Lots of spoilers for Love is Blind Season 4 are ahead.

Season 4 of Love is Blind has come to close after a few happily ever afters for our favorite couples (Tiffany and Brett 4ever), a big dose of heartbreak for Micah and Paul, and plenty of annoying baby questions from host Vanessa Lachey. For a reality show that’s all about love, Love is Blind also focuses heavily on family dynamics, and viewers probably picked up a parenting lesson or two while watching this season. Whether you learned exactly what to do, or maybe what not to do, lessons are lessons, right?

If you haven’t seen Netflix’s hit dating show, the couples on LIB meet and go on dates in “pods” where they can hear each other but not see what the other person looks like. They get engaged sight unseen, then finally meet, take a brief vacay together, and then move in together and start meeting the fam. That means you see plenty of good, bad, and downright ugly family moments play out on screen. In general, the families are surprisingly loving and supportive, even if they’re a little hesitant about the whole my-kid-just-got-engaged-on-reality-TV process. But alas, not all parents are perfect, and viewers do see the contestants deal with all kinds of parental conflict.

Fortunately, Love is Blind Season 4 was mostly filled with happy families, and even in the contestants’ rough moments with their moms and dads, there’s a little something to learn.


Trust your child’s judgment.


Can we all just take a moment to appreciate Bliss’ mom? What an earth angel. She had every reason to dislike Zack, who broke her daughter’s heart by proposing to someone else in the pods. But when Bliss’ mom meets Zack for the first time, and he opens up about how insecure he felt joining such a tight-knit family, she was moved to tears. Not only is she compassionate to Zack, but she says she knows Bliss would not accept a proposal from someone she doesn’t love, and that she trusts her daughter’s judgement fully. We love to see it.


Support your child’s choices, no matter your own beliefs.


When Chelsea is talking to Kwame before her dad comes over to meet him for the first time, she expresses how nervous she is to tell her father she’s engaged. She says he has some pretty negative feelings about marriage in general after his own divorce. But when she springs the news on her dad, he pauses, and congratulates the couple, and looks genuinely excited for them. He smiles through their whole dinner, and you can almost see the weight of Chelsea’s anxiety lift off her shoulders.


Just show up.

Speaking of Chelsea and Kwame, viewers saw Kwame really struggle with his mother’s reaction to his engagement. While their calls are never shared on screen, we see him reaching out and trying to connect so his mother and Chelsea can meet, but ultimately Kwame tells Chelsea his mom doesn’t support their engagement and will not attend their wedding. Happily, at the reunion, we learn that Chelsea and Kwame’s mom have a great relationship. While Kwame’s mom did eventually come around, she put him through a lot of stress and heartache that probably could’ve been avoided.


Be open to a little feedback.

How many Boomer parents bristle at even the slightest criticism of how they raised you? Not Brett’s dad Herbert, though. When introducing Tiffany to his father and brother, Brett mentions that his family always loved each other, but wasn’t open about expressing their affection. And his dad hears it, takes it in, and agrees. He says yes, their family has always been tight-knit, but they aren’t very vocal about it. At the end of the meetup, everyone hugs and says “I love you.” *Chef’s kiss.*


Genuinely try to bond with your child’s partner.

Paul’s mom, with her polka dot dress, big sun hat, and sunglasses just looks like the most fun. And when she and Micah meet, you can tell Mom truly wants to get to know Micah and learn about who she is. Too many parents on Love is Blind just quietly gawk at this new person sitting next to their kid, hoping their son or daughter will blink twice if they need rescuing. But you can tell Paul’s mom really wants to get to know Micah, with Micah even mentioning she and Paul’s mom text often about wedding planning in a later episode.


Tell them you’re there, no matter what.

Micah’s parents, for their part, seem 100% supportive through their daughter’s engagement. In the final moments before he walks her down the aisle, Micah’s dad (also named Paul) says to her, “We’ll always be behind you.” His daughter, unsure whether she was about to get married or left at the altar, clearly needed to hear those words — whether this goes according to plan or totally sideways, we’ll be waiting for you.


Don’t do...anything Bliss’ dad did at that dinner.


Now this, this is Boomer parent behavior. Bliss and Zack have dinner with her father and stepmother, and wow, not one single moment of it was easy to watch. Her dad lets his skepticism of the whole situation make him act kind of rude to Zack, and he accuses his daughter of not taking marriage seriously and setting herself up for a divorce (which, as a child of divorce herself, must have been extremely painful for Bliss to hear). Bliss says during the reunion that her dad and Zack are super close today, but this first interaction earns him a big fat F on his parenting report card.


Remind them to use their head and their heart.

Oh Paul, sweet scientist Paul with his big SAT words and logical approach to life. When Paul sees his mother before the wedding, he expresses to her that he doesn’t know whether he’ll say yes or no and can’t decide what’s best for him. She encourages him to use his heart as much as his head, pointing out that he’s guilty of overthinking. When Paul meets with his dad and stepmom prior to the ceremony, they echo the same sentiments. Ultimately he seemed to still make the “head” decision rather than following his heart, but it seemed like solid advice to pass down when your child is facing a major life decision.


Always have a “crying towel.”


When his son nervously walks down the aisle to the altar before the wedding, Brett’s dad, Herbert, holds up a handkerchief and says, “I got your crying towel right here if you need it.” Dad joke: deployed. Mood: instantly lightened. The world should call handkerchiefs crying towels from now on.

So, whether you pocketed a little piece of advice you heard this season or saw some great examples of how not to parent, viewers certainly got an intimate look into these families’ lives. Now, when will we meet the families of Season 5?

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