elf on the shelf in mini marshmallow bath
Courtesy of ashstatz on Instagram

25 NSFW Elf On The Shelf Ideas For Moms With A Dark Sense Of Humor

Just don’t let the kids see.

Originally Published: 

Once the Elf on the Shelf starts making an appearance, you know the holiday season is in full force. But when you need a break from the cutesy set ups, it may be time to brainstorm Elf on the Shelf ideas for adults.

This is perfect for those nights when you just need a good laugh in the midst of the holiday stress. It also works if your kids are fast asleep and you just need a moment for some grown-up humor. (After all, you will want to make sure the little ones don’t sneak a peek at these funny Elf on the Shelf ideas.) They aren’t exactly the definition of kid-friendly; many of these Elf on the Shelf ideas for adults are even worthy of a “NSFW” warning.

But first, a little history. According to the official site, the Elf on the Shelf tradition was created by Carol Aebersold and Chanda Bell. It features a charming scout elf from the North Pole who lets Santa know which kids are being naughty or nice. The concept also involves setting up the elf in mischievous poses around the house, waiting to surprise the children.

Although it's a kids’ tradition, the internet proves that grown-ups have figured out to get a good chuckle out of it. Don’t believe me? Check out these 23 adult Elf on the Shelf ideas to keep you entertained all month long.


Pounding The Keys

Perhaps these two elves are just enjoying the sounds of the season with a cheerful musical interlude. Then again, perhaps they’re not and need to take this tune somewhere private. You be the judge. Either way, it sounds like trouble.


Nob Nog

Now Elf on the Shelf, you know that’s not in the recipe for eggnog. No one is going to want to take a sip of your bowl of punch with Elf on the Shelf around, especially after he’s had a few glasses and forgets how to find the loo.


A Bad Case Of Suck & Blow

Yikes, this looks worse than an episode of To Catch a Smuggler. Kids, don’t do drugs. And parents, don’t let your Elf do drugs either.


Wrecking Ball Elf

Miley Cyrus has nothing on a nacked Elfie getting freaking on a wrecking ball. Once again, Britain’s Poundland variety store can be blamed for this awful creative interpretation of a pop hit. No word on how they got Elf on the Shelf too look like this either.


Criminal Minds Elf On The Shelf

Oh god, this doesn’t look good for Barbie. But Elf on the Shelf better come up with a good alibi and fast. Those ketchup, er, blood stains aren’t going to wash themselves out. Looks like he’s facing 25 years to life.


Elf Evacuation

In answer to your kids’ question, “Mommy where do elves come from?” Well, here’s an answer. Hat tip to OB/GYN Dr. Jennifer Gunter for coming up with this anatomically correct delivery of the holiday’s most timeless toy.


Martini Party

Dessert for grownups? Yes please. I'll take three.


Hot Tub Ladies

Clearly, Barbie and her friend wanted in on the fun. They sure look cozy, don't they?


Fireball Pup

This might explain why your four-legged friend has been acting strange.


The Pin Pricker

What a naughty elf. Hide your condoms, people.


Elf Electrocution

Someone is up to no good... again.


Potty Mouth

Oh, elves. Aren't they just sweethearts?


The Girls

You'll never look at eggs the same way again.


Merry Mooning

This is how you know someone had way too much eggnog.


The Hangover

Thankfully, this elf has a hat to hold his hair back.


Potty Training Gone Wrong

Something tells me elf essential oils don't smell too great.


Goodbye Olaf

Who knew there was beef between the elves and Olaf?


Squash Surprise

This is exactly why you should eat your fall squash before the elves get to it.


Caught In The Act

Even the angel on top of your Christmas tree isn't safe from a naughty elf.


RIP The Grinch

Thanks to this mischievous elf, there's a good chance the Grinch can't steal Christmas after all.


Rough Night

This one didn't even make it to the bathroom.


What's For Dinner?

Christmas cannibalism at its finest.


Secret Toys

Because adults need toys, too.


Merry Mug Shot

Santa isn't going to be happy about this one.


Jolly Vibrations

Well, this elf is clearly ready to party.

Grossed out or cracked up, you might need a little Elf on the Shelf humor to get you through the next few weeks before the holidays.