There are a number of things that circulate through the mind in the early hours of morning when everyone else is happily sleeping and you’re left wandering the halls alone. What can you do in the middle of the night? More often than not, I think about my favorite books and authors and take the time to immerse myself in their words. Occasionally, I go for walks beneath a grey moon that seems to shine for only me. Frequently, I do laundry because the laundry room is always empty at 2 a.m. on a Saturday night. And sometimes, if I’m being totally honest about what I actually do in the middle of the night, I think about what it means to have good sex. And I feel like I can safely say, as a night owl who has had my share of sex, that those of us who don't necessarily sleep by the conventional time table have a tendency to take that disregard for anything "normal" or "average" and apply it to our sex lives. This (and so many other reasons), is why I feel fully confident in asserting that night owls are the absolute best people to have sex with.
What is it about the late-night energy that makes us so much better between the sheets? How do we know how to be amazing in bed? Is it something about how alert we are? Does it have to do with how comfortable we are in the dark? Is it a product of being so comfortable with ourselves? After all, we do spend much of our time alone since everyone else in the world evidently finds sleeping fun and has no trouble getting lots of it. It's probably a little of all of that. Here are a few more thoughts about why night owls are especially bringing it in the bedroom:
The Element Of Surprise
There’s nothing quite like waking up to an aroused partner sweetly trying to cajole you into a morning romp. If you’re in bed with a night owl, there’s a solid chance that when you open your eyes, they’re ready to go. Don’t worry: Night owls are also completely awake so they’re happy to do all the work.
We Have All The Energy
Those of us who thrive during the nighttime hours are likely to be very alert when you’re ready to get down. So when most would be tired and debating whether or not sex is even worth the effort, we night owls are at peak performance. If you take a night owl home, be prepared for some pretty intense cardio.
We Can Be Incredibly Focused
The type of people who stay up all night are the type of people who know how to focus on a solitary task. And if your sexual encounter is the solitary task at hand, you better believe they will rise to the challenge.
We Both Crave And Bring Intensity
Being naturally drawn to the nightlife tends to make people more intense. We night lovers are the ones who savor dark streets, orange lamplight, and the feel of skin in the early morning hours. Sex with a night owl is an intense drug that quickly becomes addictive.
Boredom Fuels Creativity
People who sleep less or are awake when everyone else is sleeping sometimes get bored. We get, like, for realz bored. I once got so bored that I made custard at 3 a.m. If you’re not familiar with how much effort is required to make custard, stay up all night and Google it. The point is, late-night boredom can be real. And what’s better than sex to pass the time? Even if sex is serving as a distraction from midnight boredom, it’s a damn good way to entertain yourself.
We Don't Play By The Rules
I'm not saying that everyone who sleeps soundly all night starting at 9 p.m. is boring in bed, but come on: it stands to reason that people who keep normal hours tend to keep normal routines. If you’re drawn to 2 a.m. like a mom to the wine aisle of Trader Joe’s, you’re probably more inclined to be down with mixing things up. If nothing else, you certainly don't color inside the lines. Mixing things up can be incredibly fun in the bedroom (or the bathroom or the balcony...).
There's Already Less Clothing In The Way
Having sex during the day or evening might mean having a lot of annoying clothing to take off before engaging in the act. Having sex with a night owl often means they are already half naked in bed next to you.
We're Just A Bit Different
Night owls are...different. There's really no more accurate way to put it. If you’re used to sexual activities with the 9-5 crowd, it’s good to occasionally mix it up with a stand-up comic, single mom, or a law student (or, if you’re extremely lucky, a girl like me who happens to be all three). Whomever you choose, make it someone who doesn't sleep. Because those of us who keep the midnight oil burning may just alter your view of what sex should be.
Those of us who spend our nights in a wakeful state have seen some things. I mean, we have really seen some things. The only places open at 2 a.m. are bars and the shows on television at that hour are wildly inappropriate for children. Sex with a night owl might just teach you a thing or two.
We Look Good
Hey, when you're up in the middle of the night, it can turn to working out in the middle of the night, or doing our nails in the middle of the night, or trying weirdly effectual avocado face masks in the middle of the night. Yep, it's a superficial reason but it's very valid.