10 Things Every Woman Who Hates Pregnancy Will Definitely End Up Googling
If you considered pregnancy to be a pretty miserable experience, you're definitely not alone. I hated being pregnant, but was pretty tentative about admitting my hatred because pregnancy is marketed as something every woman enjoys and feels empowered by and just, you know, adores. So, I did what any woman with internet access would do, and I consulted Dr. Google. There are things that every pregnant woman who hates pregnancy Googles, usually in search of solidarity, and I was definitely one of those women looking to Google to have my aching back.
I never thought that I would find a mega celebrity like Kim Kardashian West relatable, but watching her awkwardly waddle and sulk during her pregnancies made me want to kiss her perfectly contoured face. For a long time, women were shamed for hating pregnancy, but after Kim Kardashian West very publicly proclaimed her pregnancy gave her feelings of absolute misery and dread and exhaustion, pregnant women (like myself) were able to breathe a labored sigh of relief.
Though we shouldn't feel guilty for hating pregnancy, it's hard not to, which is why so many women turn to the internet to confess their pregnancy woes instead of opening up to actual human beings. I bet that most women who find themselves hating pregnancy, even the beautiful and seemingly flawless Kim Kardashian West, have Googled the following nine things about their 40+ week sentence, and there is absolutely no shame in this pregnancy game.
"Can I Drink Wine?"
What's the one thing so many people look forward to after a long and stressful day? That sweet, liquid elixir that helps metabolize our frustrations into a nice, rosy buzz, of course. Unfortunately, drinking during pregnancy is frowned upon (for very good and valid health reasons), so that liquid elixir is going to have to come in the form of a mocktail. A girl can dream though, right?
'What Are Signs Of Early Labor?"
Carrying a baby to term is ideal, but when you're a pregnant woman that feels trapped inside of her own giant body, it's normal to fantasize about going into labor just a little early. Once the third trimester hits, it's especially normal for a woman who hates pregnancy to be hyper-focused on every twinge and ache and pain she feels, wondering if she's in early or false labor, because when you've reached the point of needing a crane to get out of bed, you're ready to evict your body's little roommate.
"How Much Pregnancy Weight Gain Is Too Much Pregnancy Weight Gain?"
For many women, but especially for women who don't enjoy pregnancy, gestation can do a number on your positive body image. Pregnant bodies, just like all bodies, come in many varying forms and what is normal for me might not be normal for you, and vice versa. It's easy to feel a little self-conscious when you're uncomfortable (like you're literally trapped inside of a whale's body), but it's important to keep a positive body image during pregnancy. Try to think about all of the amazing things your body is doing to take care of your baby, and leave the weight gain guidelines to your physician.
"How Long Does Pregnancy Actually Last?"
When you hate being pregnant, you count every hour, day, and week until it's time to start pushing. It's basically the longest count down everrrrr and that countdown can be miserable. If you're like me, you constantly read message boards about exactly when women went into labor, and crossed your fingers that maybe you'd be one of the "lucky ones" that go into labor as early as you possibly can while still delivering a perfectly healthy baby.
Oh, and just in case you haven't googled this one yet: carrying a baby to a healthy term can vary by five weeks. How long pregnancy lasts depends on the person, but typically a healthy term is anywhere between 38 to 41 (maybe even 42) weeks. Hang in there, mama!
"Is It Possible To Be Further Along Than You Think You Are?"
In short, yes, you can be farther along in your pregnancy than you thought. For a woman that hates pregnancy, this is the dream. According to WebMD, the most common method of calculating your due date is by taking the first day of your last menstrual period (LMP), adding 7 days, and then counting backward 3 months. Also, the measurements of your fetus, taken via ultrasound, are a good indication of when you will deliver. However, due dates can vary, as not every woman has a 40 week pregnancy nor does every woman have regular periods, which makes calculating the "exact" due date sort of tricky.
"What Is The Most Effective Method Of Birth Control?"
If you really hate pregnancy, and I mean, really hate it, you might consider vowing to never have sex again in order to prevent such a catastrophic thing from happening to your body. Of course, that's probably not going to happen, so deciding on a suitable birth control option other than abstinence (unless that's your thing, of course) is definitely high on your priority list. The great news here is that there are lots of birth control methods available, so enjoying your new baby without the fear of getting pregnant again should be fairly easy.
"Do Kids That Were An Only Child Grow Up To Be More Successful?"
If you hate pregnancy, it's not abnormal to consider being a one-and-done family, which is why Googling any and all statistics concerning "only children," seems pretty damn reasonable to me.
"How To Cope With Prenatal Anxiety"
Being pregnant can be a stressful time for anyone, not just women who hate being pregnant, but certainly a woman who isn't enjoying her pregnancy will have a higher risk of suffering from anxiety. Prenatal depression and anxiety are very real things, and extremely difficult to deal with when we're constantly being told that we should love being pregnant. Getting through a pregnancy that you're not enjoying (and made to feel guilty about not enjoying) is tough, but it can be done. Perhaps binge watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians episodes of Kim's pregnancy will make you feel at least a little better, but if not, just remember that you will eventually not be pregnant anymore, because it's not a life sentence.
"Is It Normal To Hate Being Pregnant?"
Some women love pregnancy, and that's great for them, but do not feel guilty if you're not one of them because it's totally OK to hate being pregnant. It's not everyone's cup of tea, and you shouldn't feel judged for not feeling the way that other people think you should. The bottom line is that how you feel about what's happening in your uterus is up to you (and hormones because, you know, they suck).
"Is It Humanly Possible To Be Pregnant For The Rest Of Your Life?"
I don't know about you, but I honestly thought that my pregnancy was never going to end and I would be the first woman to spend the rest of her life perpetually pregnant and I would be studied by scientists for the remainder of my miserably pregnant life. Ugh.