11 Ways Feminist Moms Raise Kids Who Won't Slut-Shame (That Have Nothing To Do With Sex)
byM. Esther Sherman
Growing up can be
rough. By “can be,” I mean "most definitely is." Most of us experienced our fair
share of teasing and bullying and, if you’re a woman, you have most likely experienced
some form of slut-shaming. Slut-shaming can be devastating to girls and
women. Whether it’s happening in the middle school cafeteria or Twitter, the classroom or
the break room, the soccer field or the job interview, slut-shaming creates a dangerously negative identity for the person its thrust upon. A woman who has multiple
sexual partners is labeled as a “slut” while male counterparts are
congratulated for their sexual experience. But did you know that a great deal
of slut-shaming, most often and at its core, has nothing to do with sexual behavior?
Too frequently, a woman who
speaks out with authority or challenges the status quo is called a "slut" and
threatened with sexual violence. This happens (to simplify a bit) because a woman exhibiting power can only be interpreted sexual since, from a broad social standpoint, women are inherently viewed as sexual objects. And when a woman makes a display of sexual power (which, again, can literally be any gesture of power or authority, no matter how empirically desexualized it is; it will read as unspokenly sexual because it's being executed by a woman, who is a sex object), she is called a "slut." That's what it comes down to: You can't be a woman without every moment of your life being interpreted sexually, which means you can't be powerful in any regard without being viewed as subsequently sexually aggressive, and you can't be that when you're a woman without being a slut. Phew. What a shitshow.
It’s not uncommon for a girl to be labeled as
a slut without ever having a sexual experience. The nature of this epidemic
disproportionately targets women but also makes them more likely to become
victims of sexual violence – often dismissed and blamed on the victim because
they have been labeled as sluts. What can we do to stop slut-shaming? Here are
some ways feminist moms raise kids who won’t slut shame others (and they have nothing
to do with sex):