Learning how to parent in a way that's beneficial to your unique child isn't easy. Thankfully, learning about the four main attachment styles in kids — secure, ambivalent, avoidant, and disorganized — can help you figure out what's best. I've just recognized the attachment styles of my own children, and I can tell you that it's made all the difference. For example, while my son has a secure attachment style, my daughter has an avoidance one.In fact, there are signs your kid has the avoidant attachment style that can help you tailor your parenting style to your kid's specific needs, like I've had to do with my daughter.
I never knew much about parenting styles when my kids were babies. In fact, in those newborn days I think my entire style was simply "survive." But now that my kids are older and becoming their own people with their own likes, dislikes, and unique personalities, it's becoming increasingly obvious that I can't parent them entirely in the same way. I can be consistent, to be sure, but what works for one kid doesn't always work for the other. I have had to adjust, and be flexible, for the sake of both my children.
That has taken some work on my part, especially when it comes to researching and familiarizing myself with the different attachment styles in children. And since I've realized that my daughter has the avoidant attachment style — which, according to GoodTherapy.org, means a child "often fails to cry when separated from the parent, avoids and ignores the parent when reunited (by moving away, turning away, or leaning out of arms if picked up), and shows little or no proximity or contact-seeking, no distress or anger at separations" — I've had to adjust and rethink my entire parenting philosophy. Welcome to motherhood, my friends.
So if you, like me, are wondering how to best parent your child and think you might have to adjust your game plan, here are some signs your child has the avoidance attachment style... so you can go about parenting them to the best of your ability: