7 Creepy Things Only Children Do, Because Kids Can Be Scary As Sh*t
Children are ridiculously adorable, let's be honest. They do and say things that'll make you laugh and smile in a way (I'm sure) you've never laughed and smiled before. However, just like there are funny things only children do, there are creepy things only children do, too, and those things are, probably, not as hilariously pleasant. Will you laugh? Sure. But will you also be slightly uncomfortable because things got a little too weird? Absolutely.
To be fair, adults are pretty creepy, too. I think, as human beings in general, we all do some questionable things can can make an entire room feel uncomfortable. However, having a child has opened my eyes to just how strange humanity can be. My daughter, while odd in her own unique way, has different levels of "creepy" that reveal themselves depending on a few different factors, like the phase of the moon (yes, it's true), the schedule we have planned for a particular day, and a slew of other circumstances I have yet to adequately pinpoint. In other words, her "creepy" ranges from adorably strange to downright horror movie creepy. Think the twins from The Shining, you guys.
Perhaps, in the end, that's why we find the following behaviors to be "creepy." I mean, my kid is just doing whatever she considers to be natural, with absolutely no regard for social norms or any other identifier that makes certain actions "weird" while others are totally acceptable. I've just seen too many scare movies to be, at all, OK with it. Sorry, my dear daughter, but horror films are why you doing the following things isn't adorable, it's terrifying.
They Have Imaginary Friends
I'm somewhat positive (although obviously this isn't scientifically proven) that every kid has an imaginary friend at one time or another. Buzz and Woody from Toy Story were my imaginary friends, and were the source of trouble when I didn't want to get into any, and two people to keep me company as an only child. Still, when you sit and watch your kid talking to absolutely no one, it's pretty creepy.
They Have Their Own Language
Its not that a kid having their own language is creepy, it's that their particular made-up language can sound creepy. Like, are you trying to cast a spell on me, little one? Are you summoning evil spirits? Nope, nope. Don't answer that. Not in that weird language you're continuing to speak. Not ever.
They Wave Hi To People Who Aren't There
My daughter will sit down to play when we're home alone (just me and her) and randomly look up, then across the room behind me, then get a giant smile on her face and wave while laughing. I'll turn around immediately afraid of who might have entered our home without my knowledge and see, you guessed it, absolutely no one. Gulp. Who are you waving to child?
They Play With Dead Bugs
Just, like, no. There's a rule, my daughter, that when a bug dies you're supposed to dispose of it immediately (and not in mom's hand) and thank the heavens that you were able to avoid a certain bug-army attack. Yes, I have seen Arachnophobia too many times. No, I am not sorry.
They Talk About Things They Should Know Nothing About
This, you guys, really gets me. There have been instances when children speak about family members they've never met yet. Family member that have recently passed away (and they child wouldn't be aware of their death) or family members that died before they were born. How. In. The. World. Do. You. Know.
When They Talk About Death
Death is a heavy-handed subject for many, and can bring on a wide-range of emotions. For many kids, though, death is an abstract concept they're still learning about. However, when a kid talks about death as if they've experienced it firsthand, you'll probably take a good long pause and wonder if you're hearing things.
They Try To Cast Spells On You
While this is most likely only the intricacies of their unique language, they sometimes make it stranger than just speech. Personally, my daughter has walked up to both me and my fiancé, speaking her strange language and mumbling and moving her hands wildly in the air as if she were casting a spell. Then, all of a sudden, she'll stop, put her hands down, turn around and leave. Um, what just happened?!