Pregnancy sex can be mindblowingly awesome, thanks to all the hormones coursing through your body (Hello, increased libido and sensitivity!) But not everyone is up for sex during pregnancy, particularly if you’re sick, tired, and cranky. That being said, you don't have to push your partner away just because your aren't down to, well, get down. There are plenty of ways to find non-sexual intimacy with someone you care about — in fact, people in romantic asexual relationships do it all the time.
Intimacy is about so much more than sex and orgasms. It’s about feeling close to someone, which is actually it’s literal definition. And while closeness and connection can absolutely be found through sex, it can also be found through conversation, intentional touch, or time spent together. Sometimes, instead of dealing with mismatched libidos, actively seeking out non-sexual intimacy when one partner is feeling particularly unsexy by taking sex off the table can make you feel even closer to someone.
Particularly if you’re pregnant with your first child, you don’t have much time left where you get to dedicate all of your time to bonding with partners. Take advantage of the time you have to strengthen any relationship you’re in and enjoy the uninterrupted intimacy while you have it.
1. Give Each Other Full Body Massages
A full body massage is not only a wonderful way to maintain physical intimacy and connection with someone, but it feels heavenly when you’re pregnant. So light some candles, put on music, and rub away all the pain.
2. Take A Bath Together
Another great way to maintain a physical connection without sex is soaking in a warm bath with your boo. Aside from ensuring the water isn’t too hot and keeping the time limited to 15 minutes, you’re free to soak. Baths always made me feel a little lighter, particularly towards the end of my pregnancy. Add a bath bomb if you want, and soap each other up. It’s a really nice way to stay connected.
3. Ask For A Foot Rub
Swollen ankles and feet are one of the more lovely side effects of pregnancy. Getting a foot rub while watching your favorite show is sweet. I appreciate foot rubs when I’m not pregnant, and absolutely love them when I am.
4. Have Them Rub Lotion On Your Bump
This was one of our favorite forms of intimacy when I was pregnant. Every morning and every night, my partner would rub the 79 different lotions I bought to try to stave off stretch marks on my expanding belly. Not only did it create that physical touch, but it let him bond with the baby in a way, since he wasn’t physically carrying her around every day.
5. Cook A Meal Together
Pregnant people love food and cooking is a really nice way to bond and hang out with your partner. Food creates intimacy, and cooking a delicious meal together is a fun way to hang out. Food is love, after all (and mac and cheese from a box totally counts.)
6. Talk To Your Baby
This is perhaps the cutest and cheesiest thing in the world, but my partner and I loved this one. We’d talk to my belly, telling our baby stories about who we were and how much we already loved them. It was incredibly intimate to watch the baby respond to our voices and feel our little one dancing around in utero.
Always a good option because cuddling rules.
8. Take A Walk
Depending on how mobile you are, walking is really good for pregnant you. If you’re not feeling up to or into physical sexual activity, you guys might enjoy taking walks around the neighborhood together. You can even hold hands for added sweetness.
9. Dance Together
Many babies love music and will respond to it, even in utero. So grab your partner and swing them around your kitchen. It will get your heart rate up, allow your bodies to move together, and let you loosen up and laugh with one another. There’s not much more intimate than that.