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Brooklyn Decker's Quotes About Breastfeeding Are Hilarious AF

Any nursing parent will tell you that breastfeeding is a trip. There is so much that goes into feeding your little one from your boob — and not just from the actual act itself. You have to deal with the pesky logistics, people's judgments, and the physical ramifications. How do you pump and work at the same time? What if this person yells at me for nursing in public? What's happening to my boobs? Those questions are always on a nursing parent's mind. That's why Brooklyn Decker's quotes about breastfeeding made me spit out my cold-brewed coffee, to be honest.

Read through her words and you'll realize that Decker makes no qualms about being blunt when it comes to the realities of nursing. The 30-year-old actor and model, who's expecting her second child with husband Andy Roddick, has experienced all the problems — and joys — that come with breastfeeding, from missing important events to enjoying the one-on-one bond with baby. Decker knows that nursing is not an easy task for any parent, so it's no surprise that her quotes don't mince any words — even when she's talking about using breast milk as part of her beauty regiment. Just read on to know what I mean.

Hey, It's Just A Boob

In April of last year, Decker took her first trip away from her son Hank, who was around 7 months old at the time. According to the New York Daily News, Decker's Delta flight had a two-hour delay, so passengers were allowed to de-plane for a little bit. So the Sports Illustrated model decide to run to the bathroom and pump breast milk. She returned 15 minutes later, the Daily News reported, only to be told the gate was closed and she couldn't reboard.

Decker just wanted to pump; instead, she missed her delayed flight. The Grace & Frankie star wrote in two tweets, according to the Daily News,

As women and as moms we try to do it all but it sure ain't easy. ... Crazy thing is I got off to pump thinking ‘I don't want to offend the guy next to me. But why? He probably sucked a boob too.’

Decker may have been kidding, but she makes a valid and necessary point. Society stigmatizes breastfeeding, so much so that nursing parents have to put themselves in inconvenient or dangerous situations in order to do a natural, nurturing act. But why? And, really, for who? Some stranger who you'll never see again? It's time people start centering nursing parents in the conversation, not those who are easily offended.

Breast Milk Is Not Just For Babies

I am all for natural beauty products — you know, items that do the least amount of harm to animals and the earth. Turns out, breast milk falls into that category, according to Decker. The mom-to-be told US Weekly that breast milk is reportedly "good for the face," though she hasn't tested it herself.

Decker explained to US Weekly,

I heard it’s a cure-all and it gets rid of zits and under eye circles. I was a little too scared to try it the first time around, but I might steal a little milk from this baby and see what happens.

Hmm, if I only knew earlier that my breast milk could have cleared up my complexion...

Wait, What Happened?

In March, Decker sat down with the New Potato to talk about her acting and modeling career, her sense of style, and — of course — motherhood. Although Decker wasn't speaking specifically to breastfeeding, her quote nonetheless relates to the reality of what happens after you finish nursing.

She told the New Potato,

It gets better and better and better and better. Every cliché is true. Your nipples will heal. Your boobs will not.

*Looks down at chest* She's not wrong.

Where Is The Lie?

So this one is less quote and more #truth. According to the Huffington Post, Decker posted a photo to Instagram during last year's Golden Globes to explain why she was absent from the awards show. In the image, Decker is shown breastfeeding her son Hank. She added the caption,

#notgoldenglobes #mykidsuckingonagoldenglobetho

Sure, "#mykidsuckingonagoldeglobetho" is not actually a quote. But it's still way too relatable of a hashtag for anyone who has nursed before. Yes, when a breast is so engorged with milk, it does look and feel like a globe. Now just add your baby's hands holding your breast up while nursing, and you got yourself a Golden statute, if you know what I mean.

Maybe you don't. That doesn't matter. The fact is, Decker has said everything every nursing mother has thought, whether it's about not attending the Golden Globes or having to go to a bathroom to pump. And it totally helps that she's used humor to do it.

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