How To Tell Which 'Game Of Thrones' House Your Kid Belongs In
We would all be lying to ourselves if we said that we didn't want our kids to identify with House Stark or Targaryen, so let's be real. If you're wondering which Game of Thrones house you belong in, or which one your kid would be in, you've got to consider the person in question from all angles. If your kid is super big on adventure, for example, and a natural leader, then you've got yourself a Targaryen. But if there is more compassion and levelheadedness in your kid already, then go ahead and assign them a dire wolf puppy already so they can party it up in Winterfell.
Of course, not every kid is good. You might have to accept the possibility that your intelligent-but-calculating terror of a child could belong in House Lannister. A Lannister might "always pay his debts," but sometimes that can mean impulsive pettiness (wait, isn't that all kids?). In the same way, those in House Baratheon aren't ones to f*ck with either. If your kid is a temperamental one, quick to jump a those who appear to threaten them in even the slightest way, then they'd better get used to the battles that the Baratheons are known for.
I could also tell you how your slightly vindictive, way-too-smart kid would totally be of House Martell, or how your tough-as-iron (get it?) little is from House Greyjoy all the way (get it?), but since there are, like, nine main noble houses and several under them, then let's just focus on four of the major Game of Thrones houses, one of which your kid totally belongs in.
If your kid is quick to succumb to that huge temper of theirs, then they would probably do best in House Baratheon. Although the family is full of crude brutes like the late Robert Baratheon, the only thing that members of this house need to fit in is a solid temper that affords them the ability to "see red" when carrying out tasks.
In reality, you could probably do well to deal with this sort of behavior by reinforcing positive outlets of that aggression, as opposed to resorting to more dramatic means of getting your temperamental kid under control. Not that there really is such a thing as control over a Baratheon. Robert had like 30 kids for a reason.
Well, first, your kid cannot be of House Lannister without being a total toe head. (OK, maybe Tyrion has proved that Lannisters can also be dirty blondes, so I guess we can let that slide too.) But Lannisters are also pretty intelligent, for all of their faults, as they're quick to come up with the sort of Cersei or Tyrion-run schemes to help them get their way in Westeros.
If your kid is meant to be of House Lannister, then you've at least got a plus with having a smart kid on your hands, But as we all know, smart kids can also be hella trouble makers in that they're sometimes smarter than us. So be warned.
Good news: If the Game of Thrones house your kid belongs in is House Stark, then you've got a kid who knows right from wrong and wants to be inherently good. Yeah, yeah, so Eddard had to execute someone via decapitation in the very first episode, but it's all just politics, right?
Not only does your Stark kid have a good idea of right and wrong, but they are also smart enough to know when to play it cool in situations and when to exert their strength. Basically, just like in Game of Thrones, if you've got a Stark, you've got one of the best. Go you.
Being in House Targaryen means more than being able to pull off that natural bleach-blonde hair look and being able to domesticate dragons. If your kid belongs in House Targaryen, then they're a born leader, easily fitting into a similar role regardless of the situation they're in. Just look at Dany, who rules as the Khaleesi, and then controlled the Unsullied, and Mereen, and now it looks like she's going to be leading the Dothraki yet again.
Talk about serious leadership, right? Basically, if your kid is anything like Dany and belongs in House Targaryen, then you're kind of lucky.
Regardless of what Game of Thrones house your kid belongs in, though, can we all just thank the Many-Faced God that Joffrey does not belong to any of our family trees? At least we all have that to hold onto.