If you don't love The Golden Girls you should probably start questioning your tastes. Between silly Rose Nyland, bawdy Blanche Deveraux, the dry-witted Dorothy Zbornak, and the hilariously inappropriate Sophia Petrillo, those gals know how to eat some cheesecake and have a good time (all while bucking societal notions of aging women). If you do love The Golden Girls, then get ready to get excited... because this year, the folks at Always Fits are bringing us the Christmas tome we never knew we needed: The Golden Girls, 'Twas The Night Before Christmas.
Written by Francesco Sedita and Doug Yacka and illustrated by Alex Fine, the book is filled with full-color illustrations of our favorite characters one stormy Christmas Eve, and they're in their full, unrepentant glory, which makes us love them all the more. I know that I can't wait to see more interactions between the ladies, even if it is in illustrated Christmas fanfic. I miss those gals who bucked trends and made waves during an era when that was so frowned upon. Truly, we could use a little bit more of that right now. Plus, this has the added value of being nostalgic and feeling like something warmly remembered from our childhoods. When you combine it with the treasured tale of 'Twas The Night Before Christmas, it becomes almost too good to be true.
This panel makes me feel a lot of feelings. Where is Blanche's single daughter, Rebecca, and grandbaby, Aurora (no, I did not have to Google those, I've just seen each episode that many times)? What about her gay brother, Clay Hollingsworth? Where are they now? Would Blanche be a great grandmother? Did Clay adopt? There are so many questions, and if they are held off by the storm, I fear as though I may need more cheesecake or perhaps something stronger.
Personally, I simply adore The Golden Girls. I remember turning them on every night before dinner and watching a few episodes with my mom. It didn't matter how many times we'd seen them, or what they were about. We'd just hang out, eat snacks, and watch the ladies we loved on-screen. Over the years, our watching became more bittersweet as cast members passed away, but I can't stop myself from watching them, especially now that they're all available to stream on my Hulu subscription. It's almost as though I'm back at home with my mom, on a hideously 1990s sofa, drinking Diet Rite with lemon and eating Snackwells like they didn't have any calories.
The Golden Girls, 'Twas The Night Before Christmas fills a hole I never knew that I had. It's the perfect gift to give to your Golden Girls-loving friend or family member. My mom is definitely getting one, so I hope that she doesn't see this article, or it will absolutely ruin the surprise. Here's the question: Do I send it with a Junior's Cheesecake? Probably best. If my mom doesn't eat it, at least my dad won't feel left out.
Although, there's a ton of cute and cool Golden Girls-themed stuff at Always Fits that would better suit my mom. Besides this book, which is just $13, there's a "Hot Slut" Golden Girls hot sauce ($10), emblazoned with Blanche's face upon it. Not that my mom is a hot slut (that I'm aware of) but more that she's a fan of hot sauces in general. As for me, I'm thinking about ordering the Golden Girls Trivial Pursuit game and starting up a Lanai club at my local brewery. Because, even if my ladies weren't into beer, millennial gals sure are, and what better way to celebrate the changing ways of feminism than with beer and broads?