Few things in life make you internally melt into a puddle of goo the way bed-sharing does. First, it’s your baby! Second, they’re asleep and willing to snuggle! Which, as we all know, means they aren’t screaming, crying, or doing much other than looking like perfect little cherubs. Plus you can’t beat baby’s breath (so intoxicating). Eventually, though, there comes a time to kick ‘em out of the room so they can sleep solo. It’s at that point that we realize all the benefits moms can celebrate once we’re done bed-sharing, and believe me, they are plentiful.
Of course, when your tot decides on they're down to move into their own bed, it can be a little disheartening. While my son mostly sleeps on his own now, I recall the first time he went a full week wanting to sleep away from mommy. While I’d been wanting him to do it for some time (so sick of getting kicked in the face, FYI), I wasn’t entirely ready for him to want to disconnect from me so soon. I knew I would miss feeling his fingers wrapped around my hand or arm, or the way he’d snuggle up close in the middle of the night. That said, I can’t lose sight of all the benefits I’ve gained from letting him finally move into his own room. See for yourself:
Regular, In-The-Bed Sex Again
It’s not that you can’t have sex when you bed-share. It’s just that your sex life suffers a bit, and you really need to get creative in order to keep it going. Sure, sexy time on the kitchen counter is fun, but sometimes you just want to roll over for the deed, and then roll back to sleep.
Regular, In-The-Bed Masturbation Again
Masturbation gets especially tricky when you’ve got a kid next to you who might wake at any moment. You could do it pretty discretely under the sheets, sure, but that’s not as fun as being free and uninhibited. Might even include some toys! Who knows?
You Can Use As Many Pillows As You Want Again
Pillows are kind of a no-no when you bed-share with the youngest youngsters. But when your kid is older, they sometimes start creating a rift between you and the pillows. Or worse, there’s just not enough space on the mattress between you, your child, the pillows, and quite possibly your partner.
You Can Sleep Naked Again
Some parents are cool with lots of nudity around their kids. Others, not so much. If you fall into the latter category, you might be psyched that, if you so choose, sleeping in the buff is now an option.
Going To Bed After A Few Drinks Is Allowed Again...
One of the major no-no’s of bed-sharing is doing so while under the influence of alcohol. There’s a risk of rolling over your child or worse, and not being able to wake up in the event of an emergency. But once you’re not sharing anymore? Drink up, buttercup (so long as your partner or a sitter is around to hear your child, that is).
...Or A Few Puffs
For those living in canna-friendly states, you also don’t have to worry about going to bed too high and having the same issue. Also, if your preferred method of consumption is smoking, you likely know that you never want to smoke and then bedshare. While most studies about babies and smoke inhalation have to do with nicotine-rich cigarettes, there’s no conclusive evidence that cannabis smoke is entirely safe, so err on the side of caution.
You Don’t Have To Change The Sheets As Often
Call me a slob, but I don’t always have the energy to change the bed sheets every single week. That said, I made the effort (usually) while our son was bed-sharing. Nowadays, I can be a little messier without feeling guilty about my body soil getting absorbed by my child.
You Can Eat In Bed Again
When you’re bed-sharing, you might want to avoid eating in your bed. Not that there’s anything wrong with it. It’s certainly not dangerous, but crumbs mean you’ll have to change your sheets more often (see previous point).
You Can Use Super Fluffy, Heavy Blankets Again
Another thing doctors tell you to avoid is using heavy blankets when bed-sharing. That’s because little ones can end up suffocating underneath them while you sleep. But once they’re not in your bed anymore, you’re free to bundle up.
Switching To A Waterbed Just Cause Is Alright, Too
You should never, ever bed-share if you have a waterbed. Actually, you should probably just never, ever have a waterbed after 1989. But hey, if your heart’s set on it, by all means.
You Can Stretch The Hell Out Like The Queen You Are Again
For a year, or maybe two or three, you’ve been relegated to sleeping on a tiny corner of your bed. Maybe you’ve been pressed up against a wall, or kicked around all night. But say no more, cause now your bed is all yours. Celebrate!