I'm not trying to brag or anything, but I am a freaking superhero. Actually, never mind, I am here to brag. I won't even lie, I'm not one of those super humble, hiding-my-cool-superhero-suite-under-my-normal-clothes type of superhero. Oh no, I am a loud and proud superhero. I mean, I deserve the right to be obnoxious about my super strength, because usually I'm just criticizing my parenting. So once in a while, I have to recognize that moms have super powers that would make X-Men jealous. You see, the X-Men are incredible, but moms are superhuman in a way that surpasses all realm of understanding, even comic-book levels of incredible abilities. Moms are the real superheroes in our world, seeing everything, hearing everything, and feeling everything. So, move over Professor Charles Francis Xavier. Us moms are the boss.
Before I get into my actual abilities, I'd like to take you back to how it all began. It's important to understand the history of motherhood in order to appreciate the true meaning of superpowers. When I had my first child, I was blown away by the natural capabilities I apparently had. I had no idea motherhood came with such extraordinary sovereignty.
It started slow, first realizing my body could create food. Then, just like Wolverine, my body healed itself. Whoa. Then, day after day, sometimes hour after hour, I was hit with one power after the other. I was suddenly able to see things while my back was turned, to hear whispers across the house, and to wake up seconds before the baby would. Cautiously, I accepted my powers and now use them with utmost responsibility. I use my powers for good, and only very rarely for evil.
All mothers possess these powers and all mothers often forget just how super phenomenal they are. This is your reminder, mom. You could give Storm a run for her mutant-money.