My partner and I moved into a new house during my second trimester, and one of the first things he did once we closed on it, was start researching a projector and screen for our master bedroom. "You're Netflixing a lot these days, so I figured you should do it in style." (Best. Husband. Ever.) I couldn't tell if my excitement was a sign that I'd become super lazy or laid-back during pregnancy, but the moment I realized I no longer cared about the distinction was definitely one of those pregnancy moments that prove you're a laid-back mom.
Even if it’s not normally your speed, pregnancy is the perfect time to relax and become a more laid-back person. When your body is making another human being, there's just not a whole lot of energy left over to sweat the small stuff — especially when previously small stuff (like going up and down the stairs) can literally make you sweat. Rather than trying to fight with your body to try to keep doing things the same way your non-pregnant self would, laid-back moms just accept that things are different now, and they don't freak out over that.
Besides, there are plenty of things to freak out over during pregnancy, laid-back mom or not. Laid-back moms realize that there's no point in adding to the list by worrying about not totally essential things, like putting on real pants or whether or not indulging in sushi is the doomsday situation your online mom group seems to think it is. Ditto for keeping up a pedicure or anything like that. (If I can't see my feet, I don't need to care about what they look like.) If you recognize the following moments from your own life, welcome to the laid-back moms club. We meet virtually so none of the pregnant ladies have to re-figure out the one position that makes them comfortable all over again (or share snacks).
When You Make It Possible To Basically Never Leave Your Bed
I'm not talking about being on doctor-ordered bed rest, either. I'm talking about the moment when you’ve made peace with the fact that you just don't have as much energy as you used to. You're probably a pretty laid-back mama if all you want to do is snuggle your pregnancy pillows and kick your feet up (when you're not running to the bathroom to pee 80 times a day), and you've got your laptop, smartphone, water, and snacks handy so you can do exactly that.
When You Take Some Of The More Persnickety Food Prohibitions With A Grain Of Salt
Surely pregnant women in Japan don't stop eating sushi. I figured, if I trust sushi to not have anything creepy in it when I'm not pregnant, it doesn't suddenly become parasite-riddled when I am pregnant. Laid-back mamas don't go out of our way to do reckless things, but we're not going to freak out about every piece of fish or lunchmeat, either.
When You Don't Worry About Wearing Stretchy Pants Everywhere
No matter where they stand on the,"Are leggings real pants?" debate, laid-back pregnant mamas are still wearing them to basically everything (but weddings).
When You Switch To Lace-Free Shoes
I mean, laces were just adding more effort to my partner's workload in my third trimester, which included helping me with my shoes in addition to making sure all my cravings were taken care of, and catching all the stuff I dropped.
When You Can’t Even Remember The Last Time You Used The Razor In Your Shower
If you're someone who ordinarily shaves off her body hair, but just can't be bothered to navigate around your belly anymore, you're in very good, very laid-back company.
When You Eat Whatever You’re Craving Straight Out Of The Container
At some point, every laid back mama just drops the pretense that she’s not gonna finish the whole thing in a single sitting, and just grabs whatever utensil (if any) she needs to get her favorite food from the container to her super excited mouth.
When Your Pets Start To Think Of You As A Pillow...
When a cat or dog wants to sleep in the middle of the day, and they decide your lap or belly is a good spot, that means they trust that you'll be sitting or laying wherever you are long enough to not wake them. One of the surest signs you've you're laid-back AF.
...Or Starts Napping In The New Baby’s Stuff, And You Don’t Sweat It
Exposure to pets cuts kids' allergy risk, right? Rock on, furry friend. Just try not to scratch anything up too badly.
When You Figure You’ll Decorate The Nursery And All That Stuff *Eventually*
Yeah, it's cool to create the ideal nursery and baby-proof the house before baby arrives. But like, they're not going to be able to move independently for their first few months. Finding and placing outlet covers really isn't all that urgent if you'd rather just cuddle with some ice cream, chips, and Netflix.
When You Use Unexpected Surges In Energy To Have Fun, Not Just Prep For The Baby
A few days before I gave birth to my son, I started feeling more energetic than I had in something like a year. Yeah, the nursery was* still a work in progress, but I decided to spend my energy on some dance classes to distract myself from the fact that I was still pregnant. Other folks in the classes were a little surprised to see someone so pregnant bouncing around next to them, but oh well. Laid-back pregnant mamas go out and have fun whenever they feel like it, knowing it might not be as simple to do so once baby arrives.
*Is. Is still a work in progress. Whatever, it's not like he really even uses his room, anyway.
When You Haven’t Even Started Thinking About Things Like Preschool Options
In crowded, competitive metro areas like mine, a lot of people start lining up their school options, getting on waiting lists and such, as early as pregnancy. Laid-back moms are fine with waiting until we at least meet our kids before trying to plot their path to their first choice college.
When You’re Late In Your Pregnancy And You’re The Only One Not Worried About You Going Into Labor At Any Moment
In my last few weeks of pregnancy, I literally couldn't go anywhere without someone's eyes bugging out of their head as they asked me something like, "Whoa! You're going to go into labor any second, what are you going to do if the baby starts coming?!"
I'd usually shrug and respond with something like, "I'll finish my sushi and text my midwife. What else would I do?"