There's no denying that pregnancy is weird. Even though I read tons of material on what to expect when expecting, it was strange to watch my body morph without my control; it was frustrating to feel so tired, and not be able to have enough coffee to "snap out of it." I was lucky in that I didn’t suffer from too many issues, like severe lower back pain or swelling. However, I was struck with food aversions (I still have trouble with raw vegetables) and my sense of smell evolved to what can only be described as superhuman. I also found myself doing some weird things during pregnancy, that I would never do if I wasn’t growing another human being.
Some women go into "nesting mode," emphatically re-organizing their entire homes to accommodate a tiny roommate or cleaning every nook and cranny until they're completely satisfied (which will be never). Others cook for days, stockpiling meals for when there is no time for dinner prep, not realizing that the food you get the most mileage out of after having a baby is the kind you can shovel into your mouth with one hand and without it dripping on the kid. Some women take multiple pictures throughout their pregnancy, documenting the changes their body is experiencing. Others shy away from the camera, and consider their pregnancy to be a more personal, intimate experience. The ways women react to pregnancy are as diverse as women themselves, yet there are some quintessential "weird things" every (read: most) pregnant women do, because pregnancy in and of itself, is weird.
So, with that in mind, here are a few of the super strange things I did when I was pregnant, that I've yet to do again.
You Get Romantic With A Body Pillow
While my partner offered emotional support, only my body-length pregnancy pillow offered me physical support in bed. During the last trimester, I had my legs wrapped around that thing every single night, helping to take the weight of my belly off my spine.
You View Fruit In An Entirely Different Way
You know that pregnancy tracking device that compares your gestating fetus to produce? Yeah, try eating cantaloupe after studying that.
You Put Headphones On Your Stomach
I wanted my baby’s musical talents to develop early, like before said baby was born. At work, I’d place my headphones under my top, on my stomach, and play Mozart. I’m pretty sure this did nothing to cultivate my child’s musical inclination, as she now rebels against piano lessons and wants to be a pop star when she grows up. Oh well, it was worth a shot, and at least there are researched benefits to your baby listening to music when they're in the womb.
You Overly Modify Your Exercise Routine
Performing standing push-ups still counts as working out, right?
You Can Get Away With Wearing A Sundress As A Skirt
Being super-pregnant in the summer sucked. However, at least I didn’t have to invest in too many maternity clothes. Shimmying my tube-top sundress down to my wait made for a belly-friendly skirt, so I had that going for me.
You Have The A/C And The Fan On And Directly In Front Of You
OK, this might not be entirely true, especially considering the ridiculous heat wave certain parts of the country are currently experiencing. Still, a pregnant woman is constantly on the verge of over-heating (well, it feels that way) and your AC unit becomes your absolute best friend.
You Eat Food Combinations That Have No Business Existing
The food cravings you experience when you're pregnant are like nothing you've ever seen, or will likely see again. I mean, ranch dressing on rice? Ice cream and pickles? These things should not go together, yet they taste so delicious when combined and then promptly shoved into your mouth.
You Dream About Giving Birth To Animals
I'd venture to guess that most people know what it's like to have a pretty weird dream (or two), but pregnancy dreams are freakin' insane. I mean, it's pretty normal for women to dream that give birth to cats or dogs or other animals. What's that about, body?!