Sex

pregnant woman touching belly
skaman306/Moment/Getty Images
Is It Safe to Have Rough Sex While Pregnant?

Experts Say To Keep These 8 Things In Mind

Updated: 
Originally Published: 

Although creating life is kind of amazing, there’s so much you have to give up when you’re expecting, too. Out the window (for the next nine months at least) are things like snoozing on your back, bouncing on a trampoline, or soaking up the heat of a sauna (and adult beverages). But one place where you shouldn’t have to make concessions is sex with your partner. So if you like things to be a little rough and tumble between the sheets, you might wonder if it’s safe to have rough intercourse during pregnancy.

Maybe before you got pregnant you liked to take a walk on the sexy wild side every now and then. Are you limited to missionary style from now until the birth of your baby? Absolutely not, Dr. Stephen Weiss, assistant professor of OB-GYN at Emory University in Atlanta says. If you’re nervous about pregnancy sex in general, don’t be. “It is a fallacy that the shaking of the uterus is a cause of miscarriage or pregnancy complications,” Dr. Weiss says.

So don’t stress about having to ditch the dildo or hide the handcuffs, and read on to understand the ins and outs (ha) of rough pregnant sex.

1

Thrust With Caution

Marin/PhotoAlto Agency RF Collections/Getty Images

Weiss notes that hard thrusting is OK, but you should proceed with caution. “Vaginal sex is safe, but for some women, the cervix has more gland tissue and will spot or bleed,” Weiss says. If a bout of rough sex leaves a little blood on the sheets, keep an eye on it. If it doesn’t become a heavier flow and stops on its own, your cervix may have just been a little sensitive to all of the extra thrusting.

2

Spanking During Pregnancy Is Okay

As long as it’s consensual, Weiss adds that there is no problem with enjoying some spanking while pregnant. For some women, doggie style is a better position for pregnancy sex, so adding in a few little spanks may make it all the more pleasurable. Just be sure to spank in safe areas, such as the butt, and stay away from your belly. “It’s all about comfort for the woman in relation to her abdomen,” OB/GYN Dr. Kim Langdon, MD, tells Romper. “I would not recommend trying new ‘things’ for the first time in pregnancy.”

3

Anal May Be Better During The 1st Trimester

And here’s why. “Anal sex may lead to rectal bleeding since hemorrhoids are more common in the 2nd and third trimesters,” says Dr. Langdon. Since hemorrhoids plague a lot of pregnant ladies and can bleed after a bowel movement, be aware that anal sex may be painful or sore.

4

Sex Toys Are Fine

If you’re looking to spice things up, (and are into rough sex while pregnant), then you could tote a toy or two into the bedroom with you. “If you did it before pregnancy, it’s probably okay to use sex toys during pregnancy,” says Dr. Langdon. “But you have to make sure that they are well cleaned because altered microbiomes can lead to preterm birth.”

5

Keep Bondage Light

What To Expect recommends keeping bondage play light, and make sure you’re able to freely move within your binds and you should be good to go. Cutting off your circulation is definitely not recommended, and with swelling a big symptom of pregnancy, you don’t want to put too much pressure on your skin by being tied up. You’ll also want to avoid anything that can cause you to lose your breath or bondage around your belly.

6

Use Protection

If you’re in a trusting, monogamous relationship, condoms may not be necessary for you, but if you’re unsure of your partner or sleeping with other people, you’ll want to use protection. “Any transmission of STDs is potentially more harmful during pregnancy,” Weiss says. “Depending on the organism, STDs can increase the risk of miscarriage, preterm labor, and/or infection in the baby.” So insist on protection if you’re at all concerned about your sexual partner’s health.

7

Avoid The Belly Area

FilippoBacci/E+/Getty Images

For some couples, rough sex while pregnant might mean tickling. For others, it could be mild torture. No matter where you fall on the S&M spectrum, you’ll need to make sure to put your safety (and that of your baby) as a top priority. If you’re into slapping, punching, or hitting, don’t do it anywhere near your belly while pregnant.

8

Make Sure to Stay Stable

As long as it feels comfortable, you and your partner can pretty much be in any position possible. That said, you shouldn’t twist yourself into a pretzel if it means that you could potentially get hurt. Dr. Langdon advises. “Avoid any activities that could cause balance insecurities, falling, or pressure to the abdomen,” she says. Make sure that you’re steady no matter if you’re in the missionary or reverse cowgirl position.

Sex while pregnant definitely doesn’t have to be boring, especially if you’re used to a more vibrant, robust sex life. By keeping satisfaction (and safety) as a guide, you can have a sensational time in the sack, the shower, or wherever — and whenever during your nine months — the mood strikes you.

Experts:

Dr. Stephen Weiss, assistant professor of OB-GYN at Emory University in Atlanta

Dr. Kim Langdon, MD, an OB/GYN

This article was originally published on