Guys, I rarely suffer from FOMO, otherwise known as the fear of missing out. In fact, I tend to swing more to the side of LOMO, or a love of missing out. I’m a homebody, often content with staying in and hanging out with my family. That’s not to say that I don’t enjoy nights out, because I totally do, it’s that I never really mind staying home. Thankfully, since having a kid, I've found multiple reasons to stay at home, and a number of specific excuses parents can make to get out of plans. This, dear reader, is the freakin' dream.
For the record, I’m not suggesting that other parents lie to get out of commitments, or that the only reason you should procreate is because you'll have more than few solid excuses at your disposal. I'm simply acknowledging that with a kid (or kids) in the house, there’s pretty much always a reason to get out of plans if you’re dedicated and committed enough to find it. In fact, let's be real, even if you're not all that dedicated to the search of the perfect excuse, you'll find one anyway. Babies (and toddlers, and I imagine every other age of child) are good like that.
On any given night in our household, at least three of the following go-to excuses would apply. Let’s take a look, shall we? Here are the excuses — I mean, the totally legitimate reasons — that we may have to cancel our plans tonight. Feel free to borrow, my friends.