It's New Years and everyone is posting their resolutions. Lose weight, be healthy, stick to a schedule, go to the gym, volunteer, get a promotion; honestly it is all so stressful. Seriously, y'all you need to chill out on with the endless resolutions that make you feel inferior. My opinion? Be lazy. Embrace your inner lazy mom and resolve to do less, not more. There are lazy mom resolutions every mom should make, especially you type A moms out there (no judgment, just sayin').
I'm lazy. I know it and I love it and I make no apologies for it. I tried not to be lazy when my oldest was little, but I sucked at it and it stressed me out and made me feel like I was constantly failing (even when I wasn't). I tried to do everything "perfectly," and do all the "right things" and do whatever a "good mom" does. It made me, literally, want to give up on this whole parenting thing. I felt like I couldn't do it all or as well as anyone else, so why try? My house doesn't look like a Pottery Barn ad and I didn't have Williams-Sonoma Christmases. However, and it it took me a while to actually realize it, but that's not me and that's not my life and as soon as I let go of my unrealistic expectations and embraced my lazy, everyone's lives improved.
So, mamas, consider an alternative this year. Instead of planning to do more, resolve to be unapologetically lazy. In fact, here are some suggestions to get you started:
Take More Naps
I don't know you, dear reader, but I can guarantee that you need more rest. You deserve more rest, in fact, so take it whenever you can. Even catnaps on the sofa while your kid naps will improve you overall wellbeing. Resolve to not only take better care of yourself physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. Rest. Do it.
Schedule Less Stuff
Stop over-scheduling yourself and your kids. Resolve to spend time being home and relaxing, instead of hauling your kids from activity to activity or yourself from errand to errand.
If you must follow a schedule, schedule downtime. Write it in your planner or on your calendar. Make an appointment with yourself to chill the you-know-what out.
Stop Stressing Over Messes
You know your kids are going to make the same messes all day everyday, so instead of picking up after them all day long, just do one pickup at the end of the day. There's no point in putting the blocks away when they're just going to pull them out again in 15 minutes. It stresses you out and wastes time better spent doing something else. You are not Mary Poppins.
Wear Pajamas All Day Long
Seriously, this is every lazy mom's credo. If you don't need to put on real pants, don't. If your kids don't need to get dressed, let them stay in their pajamas. My kids even go play outside in their bedtime clothes. It makes less laundry and less stress because everyone knows dressing a toddler is like herding cats.
Stop Trying To Be The Perfect Mom
There is no such thing as the "perfect mom." There is no Ma Ingalls or Carol Brady or Claire Huxtable or Molly Weasley. We are all Peggy Bundy, so we might as well embrace it.
Stress Less About Screen Time
I promise, your kid won't turn into a sociopath or a glazed over, vacant-stared vegetable if you turn on Doc McStuffins while you scroll Facebook or cook dinner. Screens are a part of life, and while I don't advocate having the television on every hour of every day, a little bit of Disney or PBS is necessary self-care for the lazy mom.
Don't Worry About How Other Moms Are Parenting
"Comparison is the thief of joy." Theordore Roosevelt said that, and I think it's time we all add a little Roosevelt to our lives. So, stop comparing yourself to anyone else. This is your life, not anyone else's life. It's tempting and sometimes impossible to fight against, but try to stop looking at Pinterest and Facebook and believing what you see. The people you want to be like? Yeah, their lives are just as messy and hard and chaotic as yours. Live your own truth and stop comparing your truth to what you perceive to be someone else's.
Ask For Help...
I know, I know; it's hard to ask for help and potentially show your vulnerabilities. However, there are times when you need assistances and support and, more often than not, people want to help you.
...And Accept More Help
Of course, after you ask for help you need to actually let people help you. I don't know about you, dear reader, but accepting the help being offered to me is honestly the hardest part of the entire process. Be it with babysitting or helping you clean your kitchen or taking over the PTA or whatever, just let them help you.
Cut Yourself Some Slack
This is going to be my primary resolution this year: stop being so hard on yourself. What I do every day for myself, my family, and my children is hard work and, well, I'm killing it.
Be good to yourself. Tell yourself nice things. Treat yourself well. You deserve it, mama.