10 Things I Wish I'd Known About My First Postpartum Hair Cut

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I could write an epic novel filled with all the things I didn't know about pregnancy, labor, childbirth, and postpartum life. Hindsight is 20/20, though, so when I take the time to look back, I’ve discovered a few things things I wish I’d known about my first postpartum hair cut (I thing I honestly didn't even think was a thing).

I confess, getting a haircut was low on my priority list after my son arrived. In the whirlwind of diapers and tears and snuggles, it fell somewhere between “wash the 24 month clothes that we won’t need to at least a year” and “figure out a bottle storage system.” In fact, it actually took re-acclimating myself to the human world, joining various moms' groups, and even appearing on local news to talk about motherhood, to get in gear and schedule a hair appointment.

For context, I tend to have a pretty casual approach when it comes to my personal beauty regimen. I like to paint my own nails, I’ve been known to trim my own bangs, and I interpret the casual vibes of my Eastern Washington city a perfect reason to skip makeup when I’m out running errands. Not that I never get fancy, because I enjoy that, too, but I simply don’t always get fancy. I share this because I think it’s important to give context to just how amazing it felt to get my first real haircut as a mom. It's all about the little things, you guys.

I Didn’t Need To Wait

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I wouldn't go as far as saying that haircut was life-changing, but it did feel pretty awesome. It seems a little silly that I waited as long as I did (almost a year after my son's birth). Looking back, it would have been a great bright spot in one of my earlier postpartum days.

Now that I think about it, maybe I'll put a haircut reminder in my phone for six or so weeks after my second baby's arrival. BRB.

I Didn’t Need To Admit All My Insecurities To The Stylist

Perhaps this has more to do with my stylist's personality, but I remember her seeming slightly amused at my logic for finally getting my haircut when I did, which stung a little bit. I assume that's not exactly protocol for stylists, and that I'd be unlikely to encounter it again, but still: she didn't need to know every last detail about what motivated me to come in on the particular day I did, just like I didn't need to see her response in the mirror.

It’s OK To Know That You’re Fitting Into A Stereotype…

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Mom jeans and a mom haircut? Yeah, I've heard these kinds of references before, and they obviously come from somewhere. At least I managed to leave my pleated jeans at home for the occasion.

...And To Proceed Anyway

Yes, in the back of my mind, I knew that chopping inches off my hair was very much in line with the "mom haircut" stereotype, but I still went for it and I have no regrets.

It Will Feel Like A Legit Spa Excursion

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Logically I know there's a difference between sitting in a stylist's chair for 45 or so minutes, and spending an afternoon (or a day) in a white robe at a spa. However, after those first months of motherhood, to have anyone give me any kind of pampering for even a limited amount of time made me feel like I imagine Mariah Carey feels everyday: like luxury was dripping out of my pores.

You Might Start Considering All The Other Ways You Can Achieve The Same Feelings

I mean, short of constantly going to said spa for hours at a time (which wasn't exactly feasible with my family and work situation) I was at a loss for how to continue that fresh and fancy feeling that my new haircut gave me. Speaking of, does anyone know any personal stylists who are perhaps looking to bump their pro bono client roster? Let me know.

I Won’t Be Able To Recreate The Same Look When I Go Home And Try To Do It With A Young Child On My Leg

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Perhaps you'll have better luck with this, but my hair never looks as good as when someone else does it. I'm not sure if it's simple physics, or even the laws of gravity, or maybe it's just my ineptitude with a curling iron, but still, I've come to accept that this is simply one of life's most disappointing truths.

It Won’t Change Life Completely…

As much as I like to live my life pretending that I'm in a '90s teen movie, I have to admit that getting a new haircut did not turn me into the coolest kid at my school, nor did it make all of my other problems go away (or even stop my kiddo from peeing through his diapers onto all of my shirts).

...But It Will Make You Feel Really, Really Good...

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I mean, yes, it absolutely made me feel good. Then again, we all know that if we want real magic to happen, I'd need to get rid of my glasses and start wearing expertly-applied makeup on the regular, and that's just not realistic.

...No Matter How Tired You Are

If my calculations are correct, one good haircut is equal to 2-3 bonus hours of sleep. In other words, it's totally worth it.