Life
A common fear among most first-time moms-to-be is an overhaul of one's personality. Your likes and dislikes can completely change as you adjust to your new parenting role, so an identity crisis of sorts isn't completely unheard of. However, I can almost guarantee you'll get back to your old self fairly quickly. One thing that may never be the same again, however, is the scenarios and thoughts that turn you on. So, I asked moms to share the one sexual fantasy they had before having kids that totally freaks them out now. To my surprise (read: delight) I got some really surprising, and by "surprising" I mean "kinky," answers.
For me and my post-baby self, my idea of a wild fantasy that would leave me totally satisfied, is a long leisurely lie in, followed by an uninterrupted breakfast that I didn't have to share, a soak in a hot bath, a little shopping, not changing any diapers and then maybe a nap. That's my dream and, as vanilla as it is, it still sounds heavenly to me.
Becoming a mom shouldn't really change you completely. After all, moms — like any other human being — still deserve and should expect fulfilling, pleasurable sex lives once they become parents. Still, it's totally normal if some of your pre-baby fantasies make you feel a little icky now, including some of the following:
Rosie
"I used to call my boyfriend 'Daddy' during sex. Now that he is one, it really makes me gag. So gross."
April
"We liked playing school girl and teacher games. Our daughter is starting school and it just seems really creepy and wrong."
Sara
"I used to get so turned on at the prospect of being caught having sex. Just the idea would get me going, but now that we actually have little people who like to wander around the house and come into our bedroom uninvited, it's not sexy anymore. At all."
Anonyomous
"My partner and I are into the S&M scene. Even though we have kids we still practice the lifestyle, but we don't go to parties anymore and we don't have sex with anyone else. I don't judge anyone's sexual habits, but I just don't want our kids to see anything they shouldn't."
Jo
"Totally just a fantasy, but I used to like to pretend I was a really young virgin and my husband was like teaching me stuff. Now we have little girls ourselves that just freaks me out."
Ruth
"I used to like being spanked with a little whip. My kid found it and was running around the house hitting things. It lost its mystique after that, so I threw it in the garbage!"
Rayanne
"I love firefighters and my partner used to dress up as one for me, until our little boy got a fireman costume for his birthday. I just think of him when I see it. Eww."
Cheryl
"Nipple play used to get me off. I am breastfeeding now and if anyone else touches my boobs I am going to scream!"
Kelsey
"Having sex outside used to really turn me on. Now the idea of getting caught and having to explain that to my daughter just sucks all the enjoyment out of it."
Sally
"I have a sexy nurse outfit and I used to wear and take care of my man. Honestly, after a long day of looking after kids, I don't want to take care of anyone else."
Laurie
"My boyfriend and I loved having sex on film, we made a lot of home movies and we pretended we were porn stars. I threw them all away when I got pregnant. I am just terrified they will find them one day and be traumatized for life."
Violet
"I am really into threesomes with strangers, as in me and two guys. I have done this in real life a lot before I got pregnant, but now I keep it solo and just watch threesome porn. I don't think its safe to bring strangers into my home now I'm a mother."
