I Loved My Pregnancy Pillow More Than My Partner

My pregnancy pillow, aka the Fortress Of Solitude, aka My Other Husband, aka The One That Got Away, was one of the best parts of being pregnant. Shaped like a candy-cane and taking up the equivalent space of another human, this accessory was the only reason I was able to sleep. My pillow was so there for me, at times I would've chosen it over many can't-live-withouts in my life, including my partner. In fact, and I'm a little sorry to say this, there were times I loved my pregnancy pillow more than my partner.

Without my pregnancy pillow, I could never have gotten through my reflux, my nausea, my gas pains, and the awful aches and spasms that were with me all day during my pregnancy (but that really revved up at night). Sure, my husband expressed empathy for what I was going through, and brought me water when I was thirsty, or went to the store if I had a crazy craving. But when it came to holding me in just the right way, or being the comfort that I needed during those harsh times at night, it was my pregnancy pillow that supported me the most.

So while it's not my intention to take away from my partner's efforts, if my husband was "along for the ride," my pregnancy pillow was literally my "ride-or-die" when it came to the worst of my at-night pregnancy symptoms.

When It Didn't Judge Me For The Amount Of Times I Revised My Baby Registry

My husband didn't understand my obsession with our registry. He kept on pointing out that with the magic of Amazon, we could have anything we desired within a day (or sometimes even the same day) if someone didn't already purchase it for us. So why was I spending months adding, deleting, and re-adding swaddles, bottles, and pacifiers, and bouncers to our list?

I spent half of my free time while pregnant propped up by my trusty pregnancy pillow, culling our registry, while my husband looked at me like I had gone off the deep end. My pregnancy pillow was my very best friend, reminding me that I had to listen to my heart and take care of me. If choosing pacifiers was my way of feeling in control during this out of control time, Pregnancy Pillow would be there, right behind me, silently cheering me on.

When It Still Wanted To Be Close To Me Despite My Pregnancy Burps

The noises that came out of my throat sounded like something that a hobbit-like creature makes after enjoying a big homemade hobbit brew in Middle Earth. While my husband was good about cracking jokes and making light of the situation, my pregnancy pillow did one better: it held me close, cradling me just so, and held me in a way that held my neck up so that the heartburn that accompanied those burps wasn't so bad. A lot of the times, it helped alleviate the pain of the more painful burps, too.

When It Pressed Up Against My Belly No Matter What Weird Aerobics The Baby Was Doing

The jumping jelly bean inside me was something cool to look at and revere during "awake hours," sure, but at night our squirming baby was something my husband preferred not to feel when he was trying to fall asleep.

No matter, I could easily turn to my other bedtime partner, my pregnancy pillow. My pregnancy pillow didn't care if my baby was doing somersaults, Tae Bo, or even practicing some acrobatic yoga. The pillow could take it all, and, what's more, it remained firmly placed where I wanted it throughout the entire night.

When I Could Move It Around If I Didn't Like How It Felt

Sleeping on my husband's chest feels nice, until it doesn't. Sometimes I'd get a hair in my mouth, or his heart would sound too loud in my ears, or I just wouldn't like the feeling of a particular rib against my ear.

With my pregnancy pillow, there was none of this nonsense. If I didn't like the way a particular side of the pillow felt, I could maneuver it around to suit me. My husband? Well, I don't think he would like being wedged up against a well into an S shape for an extended period of time.

When It Was Always the Perfect Temperature

No body heat here! My pregnancy pillow was always a comfortable, cool temperature. If it ever felt a bit warm, or if I got some drool on it, I could just climb higher or lower onto its candy-cane shape, or twist it around a bit to the cool spot. Easy peasy, my friends.

When It Left My Body Alone And Never Asked For Anything

My pregnancy pillow had zero needs. Well, maybe one, and that was to be washed because when you've been straddling something with your crotch every night for months on end, you may want to wash it frequently.

My husband, however, had all kinds of needs that pillows do not require. When I was in the later stages of my pregnancy, I much preferred the quiet comfort of my pillow than having to engage in any bedtime activities with my non-pillow bedfellow.

When It Didn't Comment On My Netflix Bingeing

When I was pregnant with my first, I had a lot of trouble sleeping at night. Between the almost paralyzing anxiety I felt about whether I had ordered the safest swaddles that wouldn't choke my baby, to the guilt I felt about bringing home a human brother that would make my dog depressed, it took a lot to calm me down at night.

So I watched a lot of movies after dinner and every episode of Family Guy and Bob's Burgers late into the night, because laughter makes things hurt less. However, laughter at 2 a.m. isn't so great for the person sharing your bed who has to wake up the next morning early for work, and he let me know it. My pregnancy pillow didn't care, though. It fully supported me, propping me up as I stared at my iPad screen, allowing me to do what I needed to do to fight the scary feelings that otherwise were keeping me up at night.