What A Millennial Mom Really Wants From Motherhood

The self-awareness that comes with being a millennial extends right through and into parenting. Millennial moms are hyper-aware of their strengths and weaknesses, which means there are certain things millennial moms actually want out of motherhood.

It almost goes without saying that millennial moms are probably influenced the most by technology. We are a generation that has lived (for decades) with easy access to the internet, and now to instant access to endless information on our smart phones. As a result, I think, we're very self-aware as we've been socialized to analyze ourselves via social media posts for years, examining and explaining how we think and operate. That means we take frequent hard looks at how we're doing as parents and try to keep an eye on how we want to make changes for the future, both for ourselves and for our kids.

Second, we're constantly conscious of the ways technology can help or harm our lives. Remember when the girl from Blossom introduced us to attachment parenting and we all thought she was insane? We had a front row seat as the mommy wars ensued, but the end result was an environment where parenting has a little more "anything goes" vibe than a "right way" or a "wrong way" mentality. (Plus, attachment parenting became normalized, along with 15 other ways of parenting we'd likely never heard of.)

The result of our infamous technological dependence is a generation of moms who know what they want from motherhood and aren't afraid to ask (read: demand) for those things to happen.

Traditions From Our Own Childhoods

While millennials are often cast as self-absorbed jerks, we're actually surprisingly interested in creating traditions that our children will remember for decades to come. For me, that means creating and carrying on traditions that I loved from my own childhood, giving my children a glimpse of what generations before them have grown up with. Whether it's a particular Christmas tradition, or even carrying on the value of giving to others, I want my kids to experience certain childhood things that shaped me for the better.

Time As Ourselves

More than any previous generation, millennial moms seem to want to keep some of their pre-mom identity in tact as they enter parenthood. Call it "me time," or whatever you like, but millennial moms understand how important time away from being a mom is to their mental health and wellbeing.

To Use That Degree...

More millennial moms than ever have college degrees, and we'd like to be able to use them. However, that may not mean continuing to work full-time (or more than full-time) while also trying to manage motherhood. That might look different than a typical 9-5, but millennial moms want to put their brains back to use after entering motherhood.

...Or Have The Freedom To Choose Not To

On the other hand, millennial moms want to have the freedom to choose not to use all those years of schooling without being judged for choosing to stay home and put their career on hold indefinitely. Millennial moms don't want to be expected or assumed to take on any role they don't feel is right for them or for their family.

Time Being An Adult With Partners And Friends

Millennial moms want to nourish their relationships with their partners and friends. They value time invested in maintaining those relationships for the long term, and they understand how important it is to enjoy those friendships throughout motherhood.

Technology For Good

Millennials are the smart-phone generation and get a bad reputation for it. However, most millennial moms I know want to use the availability of technology for good. We're all keenly aware that phones have an enormous role in our lives, so we're all ready to figure out how technology can work for us, not the other way around. That means figuring out ways to limit it when necessary, and get out from behind the screen, as well as encouraging our kids to learn from the proliferation of apps and options our fellow millennials are creating by the day.

Raise Kinder Humans

Millennial moms are raising kinder kids, showing that they're interested in pouring their time and attention into raising their tiny humans to love and accept others without judgment.

To Choose Their Own Parenting Path

Millennial moms are attempting to bring the end of the "mommy wars" generation, by acknowledging that there is a whole host of ways to parent that might be different from their own. One of the main reasons they're ready to accept others' parenting styles is because they realize kids really don't conform to one-size-fits-all parenting. Instead, they want to be able to choose the parenting style that fits their kids, their lifestyle, and their temperament.