I remember my parents speaking in code if they didn’t want me to understand what they were saying. My older family members spoke Yiddish when they didn’t want our little ears picking up on what they were putting down. My husband and I have learned how to refrain from discussing certain topics, like what we find annoying about each other, in front of our kids, too, We think it would be confusing for our children to witness certain conversations. Likewise, I try not to say certain things about other moms in front of my kids. Just because I think it, doesn’t mean it’s appropriate to share within earshot of my children.
While many parents find it beneficial for their kids to witness certain adult interactions, I don’t think mine are old enough to contextualize all that stuff. When my kids hear me speak ill of another adult — especially if that adult is a parent of one of their friends — they may copy and regurgitate that opinion just because I said so. And I’m not always correct, or accurate. In other words, if I’m ticked off at somebody, it’s really none of my kids’ business.
I don’t need to pretend it’s all sunshine and lollipops in the adult world, but until my children are mature enough to process the intricacies of relationships outside those they have with their friends or family, I’m going to refrain from saying these things about other moms in front of my kid: