12 Things Every New Mom Thinks When Another Mom Criticizes Her Parenting
byJennifer Germano
There are many different parenting styles and most parents, as you probably know, are highly vocal about which method is best (based on their opinion and their families unique circumstances). However, let me be one of the first, and hopefully not the last, to tell you that there is no one "right" way to parent. One method may work better for my daughter while another may work better for your kid. Which, of course, is why the "mommy wars" are so hurtful and why the things every new mom thinks when another mom criticizes her parenting are detrimental and unfair and, usually, bring about an unending barrage of self-doubt.
There have been many times in my short time as a mom that I have doubted my abilities to parent. Honestly, it almost never stems from something I do or have done, but rather from the reactions and criticisms of other moms when they hear about something I do or have done. Other moms are "experienced," while I am "new mom" and still learning. While I had automatically assumed becoming a mother meant I'd be joining a "tribe" of women who constantly supported one another, I've found the opposite to be (usually, and sadly) true. Because my style of parenting is different than some of my friends' parenting styles, we've grow apart rather than closer together. I've heard more judgement than I have support. I've been made to feel like I need to defend my decisions, instead of feeling like I really and truly am the best person for the job of my daughter's mom.
While you may encounter differences among parenting styles, never let another mother tell you that you're "wrong" just because you're making different choices. There is no one way to parent. No one is perfect. Every single family is different. We're all just doing our best and seeking the validation that makes a job as tough as parenting, worth it. So, with that in mind, here are some of the things I think when other mothers start criticizing my parenting skills. I have a feeling that, sadly, most mothers can relate.