Life

Honestly, Being Pregnant In March Is The Worst

Greetings from my couch! It’s lovely here this time of year. In fact, it’s actually where I’m spending the majority of my time these days. Perhaps I should also mention that I’m on month number seven of my second pregnancy, so my feelings about this season might be somewhat skewed? Plus, it’s March, and there are more than a few reasons why being pregnant in March is the worst.

These reasons might have something to do with my newfound love affair my couch. There’s nothing more welcoming than the plush cushions, the copious amount of pillows I can use to support various parts of my body in various ways, and the blankets. Oh, you guys, can we please talk about the blankets?! I mean, can you blame me? It’s like a bed, but better, since I can still see my family and the TV from it.

We can’t ignore the fact that there’s practically been perma-layer of clouds in the sky for about four solid months right now. I’m originally from the Pacific Northwest, so I love gray skies more than the average person, but even I’m getting tired of this weather. However, my frustration with enduring pregnancy in March is not merely a result of the weather. There’s plenty of other reasons, too, including but definitely not limited to:

Spring Feels So Close, Yet So Far Away. Like Your Due Date.

Looking at the window right now (and I kid you not) I see bright sunshine and ominous gray clouds and leftover snow from this past weekend. What is this sorcery? I want to be excited about the flowers and the festive Easter candy popping up at my grocery store, but I can’t if these weird weather patterns are set on continuously stealing spring’s thunder.

Plus, since my baby’s due date is technically in late spring, the fact that I still have another seasonal transition to get through is, quite simply, a bummer.

Your Clothing Options Are In Transition

I’ve had a couple people make casual references about not noticing my pregnancy sooner, and I like being able to joke that it’s because I'm draping myself in fabric all the time: one of the true perks of being pregnant in the winter. However, now that the weather is in a full-on identity crisis, I’ve got to be ready for everything. Well, unless I want to turn into a sweaty, panting mess the moment I step outside because, oh look, I’m dressed for frigid temperatures but it’s actually above freezing for the first time in weeks.

Cabin Fever Can Be A Serious Issue…

I mean, not for me. As a serious homebody, I could stay home all day, everyday. But my loved ones are not into that kind of blessed life, so I get cabin fever just from being in their presence.

Thankfully, my toddler is in a super-cute phase where we can pass off laying under a blanket as “playing in a fort,” so at least I’ve got that to hold on to.

...But It’s Not Like You’ll Have Energy To Go Out Anyway

Even when the sun does come out, I’m more inclined to wave my family members off from the door than I am to actually bend over to put on shoes and then squish myself into a jacket. Which reminds me, I need more slip-on shoes to be delivered via mail, of course and since I'm not inclined to go shopping right now anyway.

St. Patrick’s Celebration Options Are Limited

I mean, sure, I can still wear green, eat Shepard's Pie, and I can still hold my Irish ancestors in my heart. However, I can’t exactly frolic downtown at a parade or enjoy green beer. Honestly, without those options, what's the point?

Springing Forward Is Terrible

Daylight savings is terrible in general, but requiring a pregnant woman to lose an hour of her day? An hour when she could have been sleeping? Or eating? That's simply inhumane.

It’s Hard To Tell Whether You’re Spring Cleaning Or Nesting

Am I dusting the furniture because I’m about to go into labor? Or because the reappearance of sun shining through the window is revealing that there’s dusting that needs to be done? It’s a question that has no real answer, like Backstreet vs. N Sync. All I know is that spring cleaning and nesting can feel like one and the same.

You Can’t Hear That Whole “In Like A Lion, Out Like A Lamb” Without Think Of All The Ways It Could Apply To Pregnancy And Labor

If this has never occurred to you, please accept my humblest apologies for even bringing it up and planting such an image in your mind. However, now that it's in there, let’s all take a moment to pause and appreciate the fact that it’s not "in like a lamb and out like a lion," since that sounds way worse for everyone involved.

Your Choices For Maternity Photo Locations Are Sorely Limited

All my city’s best parks? Nope. They’re still snowy and brown. Some remote, wooded location? Nope, we’re not driving through ice and mud, nor am I posing in it. Underwater? No, Beyoncé already did that. Good thing I’m either spring cleaning or nesting though, since if we're stuck doing these photos in my living room, at least it's clean.