I have to be honest and make the following confession: I hated being pregnant. So, in many ways, the time of day, or month, or season truly didn't matter. I've been pregnant in the winter and in the summer and in the spring and in the fall and I thought it was all just garbage. But if I had to really think about a time of the year that made the act of growing another human inside your body the absolute worst, it would be June. Yes,
being pregnant in June is the worst. There. I said it.
It's not that I find June to be a particularly horrifying month. As a matter of fact,
thanks to Pride, June is pretty great. And, weather wise, June is basically the beginning of what anyone could consider consistent summer days. The rooftop bars open, the happy hours feel more inviting, the summer vacations begin, the summer Fridays are in full-force (if your employer is nice enough to offer them), and the days are longer.
But when you're pregnant none of that sounds fun or enjoyable or even realistic. You're just stuck on the sideline, watching people enjoy the beginnings of their summer while you're sweating a seemingly inhumane amount. So for that, and so many reasons including the following, June is the worst when you're pregnant.
I mean, this is obvious, right? Pregnancy and a blazing hot sun is a match made in hell, people! Walking from my house to the train, then standing in a humid subway station waiting for a train, then standing on a train with a bunch of other hot sweaty people, then walking from the train to work (then doing it all again!) in 90 degree weather was, without a doubt, the worst aspect of my pregnancy. I could handle the
pregnancy insomnia and the heartburn and the swollen feet but I could not — and I mean could not — handle that June heat. Missing Out On Rooftop Bars
I don't know about you, dear reader, but I love me a nice rooftop bar. There's nothing better than a beautiful view and a bunch of happy hour specials. But when I was pregnant the last thing I wanted to do was navigate a crowded rooftop bar or wait in line for a (non-alcoholic, of course) drink or sit outside, even if the view was spectacular. Pregnancy ruined rooftop bars for me, and they're easily one of the best parts about those long summer months.
Missing Out On Summer Cocktails
OK, so even if I could have handled a rooftop bar, I definitely wouldn't be able to partake in the summer cocktails. Is there anything better or more refreshing than a nice margarita on a hot summer day? No, there is not. But when I was pregnant I couldn't partake, and that made the summer heat and the sweat just seem worse.
While a few studies have suggested that
light alcohol consumption while pregnant is safe, I personally never felt comfortable having a beer or a glass of wine while I was gestating. So that meant saying no to my favorite summer cocktails... and while I watched all my friends and coworkers imbibe with glee. Worrying About Safe Sunscreen
According to What To Expect, when you're pregnant you should
use sunscreen lotions with UVA and UVB blockers, and with an SPF of 30 or higher. You shouldn't, however and according to the same site, use sunscreen with insect repellent, as it renders the sunscreen less effective. So. Many. Rules. I constantly worried about being in the sun but I couldn't stay locked up in my home, but OMG what happens if I get dehydrated or I get a burn? And what if I pick a sunscreen that isn't helpful? Say what you may about the perils of being pregnant in the winter, but I think the summer poses far more potentially risky situations. The Beach
I like the beach as much as the next person, but not when I'm pregnant. I have to wear a probably ill-fitted yet somehow ridiculous expensive swimsuit that I won't feel comfortable in
because pregnancy. I have to watch people playfully swimming and frolicking in the sea, and at a time when I can barely move on a concrete-covered slab let alone a vast mound of uneasy sand. And we've already covered the sun-to-sunscreen-ratio problem.
Stressful. The beach, which is supposed to be relaxing, is stressful when you're pregnant.
Navigating Father's Day
This sounds bad at first glance, I know, but hear me out! I was so, so excited to celebrate my future baby's daddy when I was pregnant. The fact that we both got a "
first Mother's Day" and " first Father's Day" when I was pregnant was really magical.
But do you have any idea
how hard it is to shop for dads on Father's Day? Especially if you haven't seen them, you know, actually be a dad yet?! It was so stressful! I felt so much pressure to make that first Father's Day perfect, but so lost because, I mean, I had never done this before and we didn't have our baby here yet and why is this so hard?! The entire thing just made me want to take a nap. I wanted the baby here before the Father's Day festivities, if only for clarity's sake. The Family Vacations
No. Just say no. Don't do this to yourself when you're pregnant, especially if you're, like,
really pregnant. You'll have to deal with either driving or flying while pregnant, and that's never fun. Then you'll have to wade your way through a sea of intrusive questions because our families never know how to deal. Just skip the summer vacations back home, my friends. Trust me. Missing Out On Pride Parades Carl Court/Getty Images News/Getty Images I love Pride! I love celebrating my friends and family members and the always-growing community of diverse people who are who they are and love who they love. I love Pride parades, I love nights out celebrating Pride with my friends, and I love spending my money at establishments and organizations that promote LGBTQ inclusivity and acceptance.
I do not, however, like going to a Pride parade when I am seven months pregnant. I do not like partying with my favorite people when I'm so round and miserable and swollen that I might as well be Violet Beauregarde. Of course, I could and did still spend my money at
LGBTQ owned and friendly establishments, but I skipped out on the Pride festivities when I was pregnant. And I was pretty sad about it. Did I Mention The Heat?
It. Is. The. Worst. I. Am. Melting. OMG.