From a young age, girls are fed this mythology that their lives should go a certain way. You finish school. You meet a boy (because hello, heteronormative patriarchy). You fall in love. He asks for your hand in marriage. You plan the big wedding and get married. You go on a honeymoon. You start popping out babies. However, once you’ve lived long enough, you find out that’s all nonsense. At least, for most of us. That’s why I refuse to apologize for getting married after getting pregnant.
My husband and I had a whirlwind courtship. We met, fell head-over-heels in love, and within just a few months I was pregnant. The pregnancy wasn’t planned, but we decided to start a family anyhow. We were both young professionals and figured why not? About two months into my pregnancy, though, my then-boyfriend took me to the beach just outside his apartment, got down on one knee, and proposed. I said yes, and we had a quick elopement with the promise that someday we’ll have the bigger wedding reception with family and friends. And while some folks might roll their eyes or make assumptions, I don’t care because I live my life on my terms and mine alone. If you’re in a similar boat, maybe this list will resonate for you.