Curiosity is a great thing, and it's totally normal to be curious when you see someone doing something differently from how you do things. When it comes to parenting, however, your curiosity can be inappropriately intrusive. If the parent you're curious about happens to be a millennial mom, you might want to tread carefully before getting too far in her business. Frankly, there are some
questions no one should ask a millennial mom, unless you're looking for trouble.
Building on the self-awareness and self-possession of some of the women who came before us,
Millennial moms are increasingly unafraid to stand up for ourselves. We're less willing to silently accept other people judging us or telling us how we “should” live our lives or raise our kids. We're often willing to voluntarily share our thoughts and opinions with people who've taken the time to get to know us, but we're really not here for people (especially strangers) asking us “questions” that are either ridiculously personal, or are really thinly-veiled judgments of our choices. (Yeah, everybody is onto that trick.)
Unless you're a fan of being on the receiving end of withering side-eyes and devastating clap backs, maybe keep questions like the following to yourself.
“Why Are You Always Playing On Your Phone?”
“Always” is kind of a big word for “occasionally coordinating plans and childcare,
getting work done, and/or socializing.” Chatting on Facebook isn't all that different than chatting on a landline, and playing a digital game isn't that different than playing Bridge or whatever. Every generation has pastimes. Besides, earlier generations were never expected to literally glue our eyes to our kids 100 percent of the time. “Ugh, Why Are You Bottle Feeding Your Baby?” “Eww, Could You Maybe Cover Up Or Go Breastfeed Your Baby In The Bathroom?” “Aren’t You Worried They’ll Never Learn To Walk If You Keep Wearing Them In That Thing?” “When Is That Baby Going To Start Sleeping On Their Own?” “When Are You Having Your Next One?”
Since when is that your business?
“Are You Worried That [Clothing Or Activity Choice] Will Confuse Them About Their Gender?”
Letting kids pick their style and activities based on what actually appeals to them isn't confusing. Telling them they have to like things they don't or ignore things they like just because of
made-up gender norms, is confusing. “Aren't You Concerned That [Some Random Choice] Could Make Them Gay?” “But Are They Going To Be OK If You Go Back To Work?” “You’re A Stay-At-Home Mom? Doesn't That Drive You Crazy?” “So Are You And Your Partner Ever Going To Get Married?” “Don't You Think You Owe It To Your Kids To Stay Together?”
Parents owe it to our kids to model happy healthy relationships and not expose them to toxic circumstances. Millennial moms know it can be hard to walk away from a relationship, but it's way
better to be a single parent than stay in an unhealthy/abusive relationship. “Adopting/Being A Stepmom Is Nice, But Do You Plan To Have Any Kids Of Your Own?”
The kids we’re helping to raise
are our own, even if we aren't biologically related. Blended and adoptive families are real families, thank you very much. “You Use The Real Names For Their Private Parts?! What About Their Innocence?” “Boys Will Be Boys, Right?”