I Got My Tubes Tied & The Sex Is Better Than Ever

Ad failed to load

I recently had my "tubes tied," also known as a tubal ligation. It was pretty simple, really: the doctor cut two tiny incisions near my belly button and my bikini line, then laparoscopically banded and burnt my Fallopian tubes to prevent eggs from traveling from my ovaries to my uterus. I didn't expect to feel any differently when all was said and done, and I certainly didn't expect my sex life to change. It did, though. I mean, you guys, sex is better after you get your tubes tied. As in "the best sex you will ever have" kind of better. We need to talk about this, because, orgasms. All the orgasms.

So, why is this such a secret? I think it's partially because people associate getting your tubes tied with getting older. I mean, there are still doctors who won't perform the procedure on people they think are "too young," or who haven't had "enough kids," which is bullsh*t. You, and you alone, should control your fertility. And most people don't think, "Sex is going to be way better when I am older," so, sadly, it's common to associate old age with a dying sex life. That's not necessarily true, though. Now, I am certainly not saying that sex before my tubes were tied wasn't great. It absolutely was, but I have had some of the best sex of my life since I got my tubes tied.

So, why is it better? The main reason, I think, is that now sex is just for us. My partner and I don't have to worry about birth control, emergency contraception, or condoms. We also don't have to worry about fertility tracking, ovulation, or pregnancy tests. Pregnancy and preventing pregnancy are both now totally out of equation, as well as all of the planning, stress, worries, and expenses that go along with both. It's so freaking liberating. We spend so much of our lives thinking about getting pregnancy, we don't consider that there's life (and an awesome sex life) awaiting you after you are done. So, with that in mind and because we should all be talking about sex more openly and honestly, here are just a few reasons my sex life is the bee's knees now that my tubes are tied:

Ad failed to load

Because I Was Able To Get It On Right Away

While some methods of birth control and sterilization require that you wait a certain amount of time, or use a back up method, before you have sex, after a tubal ligation you can have sex as soon as you feel up to it.

I felt up to it about a week later.

Because There's Way Less Stress


Before my tubes were tied, when I had sex there was always at least a tiny undercurrent of stress regarding the possibility of an unplanned pregnancy. And sometimes — after a condom broke or I realized I forgot to take my pill — I would have to take emergency contraception and worry for weeks as to whether or not it worked and until I could take a pregnancy test. It's so nice not to have to worry about it.

Because I Never Have To Think About Birth Control Again

I literally never have to think about birth control again. After spending more than two decades preventing pregnancy and using almost every birth control method available on the market, it is so amazing and liberating to no longer have to pick up birth control prescriptions, remember to take pill or schedule appointments, or to have to have painful procedures or shots. I love birth control, but I love being past that part of my life so much more.

Ad failed to load

Because I Can Be Spontaneous


There's no more midnight trips to the store because we ran out of condoms. There's no more tracking my fertility on an app to avoid (or pursue) pregnancy. We can have sex whenever my partner and I want. I mean, when parenthood doesn't get in the way, that is.

Because I Don't Have To Try To Conceive

Sex when you are trying to conceive is fun, but it also can be stressful and usually ends up feeling kind of "clinical." It can make sexy time feel a bit less sexy when you have to track your cycles, do all of the right things afterwards to improve your chances of conceiving, and wait (or sometimes not wait) to see if you get your period and take a pregnancy test (or many pregnancy tests, but that could just be me).

Plus, nothing puts you off sex like holding a negative pregnancy test in your hand when all you want is to be pregnant.

Because Sex Is Just For Our Pleasure


I love my children, but between my partner and I we have five kids. Five. That's one, two, three, four, five children, my friends, all between the ages of 6 month and 11 years. My uterus is officially closed for baby-making business. Sex is for our pleasure now and nothing else.

Ad failed to load

Because My Cycle Is Finally On A Schedule

After three years of spotting, and breakthrough bleeding due to the type of birth control I was on, I now menstruate according to a relatively predictable schedule. It is so freaking awesome to know what kind of options are available in any given moment for completely spontaneous sex.

Because It's More Fun


Sex without having to worry about unplanned pregnancy, birth control, conception, or an unwanted visit from Aunt Flow is just, well, better. It's so liberating, and honestly, my partner and I have actually grown more adventurous as a result. I have a feeling it's because I have been able to remove a few items from my packed to-do list. Whatever the reason, I have no complaints. Sex after getting my tubes tied has honestly been some of the best sex I've ever had. Who knew?

Ad failed to load
Must Reads

15 Baby Names With Unique Nicknames, So Your Family Has Options

I love a good diminutive name, also known as a nickname. I believe I’m partial to them because of my own name, Abigale, but I go by Abi. And since they’re both uniquely spelled, everyone thinks my name is pronounced Ah-bee for some reason — but even …
By Abi Berwager Schreier

The Entire Family Can Enjoy These Movies & Shows Coming To Netflix In June

It's just one of those sad facts of life: every month, shows and movies vanish from Netflix, their varied excitements no longer at your fingertips. But luckily the streaming service is always prepared to fill that content void with lots of new things…
By Megan Walsh

The Reason Why Babies Smile At You Will Seriously Make You Smile

Whether you're currently the recipient of your own baby's sweet smiles or you just seem to be a magnet for baby grins in general, you might find yourself wondering why babies are always smiling at you. Sure, you could be a 'smile whisperer' but scien…
By Kate Miller

8 Ways Your Baby Is Trying To Say That, Yes, You Are Their Favorite

For a baby to show a preference for a specific person is not only normal, but an essential part of their development. Babies need to form strong attachments to their caregivers for their emotional, social, and physical wellbeing. Usually, but not alw…
By Kimmie Fink

10 Reasons Why I Won't Apologize For Giving My Toddler A Pacifier

My first child had no interest in a pacifier. I tried a couple times to get him to take one, but he always spat them out and gave me an incredulous, judgmental look. But my second? It was love at first suckle. And after a while, the incredulous, judg…
By Jamie Kenney

Being A Dog Parent Prepared Me For Having A Baby, Really

I’ve always wanted kids; I was never as sure about raising a puppy. Then I spent six months living with someone who brought home an eight-week-old golden retriever puppy, and I see no way to make it out of that experience claiming not to love dogs. I…
By Heather Caplan

20 Of The Most Popular Unisex Names Of All Time, That You'll Be Hearing More Of For Sure

You might think of unisex names as a fairly recent trend, but the truth is these versatile monikers have been commonly used throughout history (well, some more commonly than others). That's why the team over at recently compiled a list of t…
By Jacqueline Burt Cote

How To Have A Date Night With No Babysitter, Because It's Easier Than You Think

After having children, many couples feel that their love lives immediately go out the window, but it's so important to make your romantic life a priority so both you and your partner can be the best versions of yourselves you can be. As we all know, …
By Abi Berwager Schreier

9 Ways Baby No. 3 Made My Family Feel Complete

My husband and I decided to have another baby right after we got married and, well, we had no idea what we were getting into. I got pregnant right away, endured a high-risk pregnancy, and, before I knew it, my third baby had arrived. Together, we emb…
By Steph Montgomery

8 Stereotypes About New Dads That Are *Totally* True

Much like new mothers, new fathers have a lot on their plate. Parenting can be scary and complex, especially at first and regardless of your gender. People want to do right by their kids, after all. And since all new parents are a hot mess, dads are …
By Priscilla Blossom

8 Differences Between Being Pregnant In Your 20s Vs 30s, According To Science

Whether you're planning a pregnancy, or just thinking about your future family, it's typical to think about things like child-spacing, how many kids you want, and when to start trying to conceive. When making your pro/con list, you might also conside…
By Steph Montgomery

16 Moms Share Remedies For Their Most Intense Chocolate Cravings During Pregnancy

For better or worse, pregnancy is usually synonymous with odd cravings. Sure, there are the stereotypical combos like pickles and ice cream that plague gestating women the world over, but there are other mind-boggling combinations, too, including but…
By Candace Ganger

Putting Sunscreen On Your Kid Doesn't Have To Be A Fight — Here's How To Do It

I am almost translucent, so me and sunscreen are basically besties at this point. Even though my children are beautifully deep brown thanks to my husband's genetics, I still slather them like biscuits being buttered because I refuse to take risks wit…
By Cat Bowen

19 Moms Share The Way They Cured Their Pregnancy Comfort Food Cravings

I was obnoxiously sick during the first trimester with, "lucky" for me, both of my pregnancies. For the first three months I lived on saltines, lemonade, and fresh bread. Once I was able to eat, however, all I wanted was savory and sweet comfort food…
By Dina Leygerman

I Used To Judge Formula-Feeding Moms — Until I Became One

The other patrons in the hip Brooklyn restaurant probably couldn’t care less what I was feeding my baby, but I’ll always remember the shame I felt as I quickly mixed up his bottle of formula in front of them. I admitted to my childless friend that I …
By Katherine Martinelli

7 White Lies It’s Necessary To Tell To Keep Your Relationship Healthy

Telling lots of lies typically isn't associated with a healthy, strong, lasting relationship, and that's still certainly true, but not all lies are exactly the same. Though you've probably heard from someone at least once or twice that the lie they t…
By Lauren Schumacker

The Skinny Jeans That Saved Me Postpartum

Accepting my post-pregnancy body is hands-down one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done. It’s something that I still work on every single day. During my first pregnancy, I was 20 years old, so I managed to bounce back quickly. In fact, I dropp…
By Allison Cooper

7 Ways Your Baby Is Trying To Say They Feel Safe

In those first weeks of new motherhood, it can feel like you need an interpreter for your newborn. With their limited means of communication, figuring out what message your baby is trying to get across to you can be a challenge. With time, however, y…
By Kimmie Fink

Here's Why Dogs Are Obsessed With Babies' Poop, According To Science

Most family dogs seem to understand babies, and they're more than happy to make friends with the newest member of the pack. It's adorable... for the most part and until you go to change your little one's diaper. Suddenly, you're wondering why dogs ar…
By Lindsay E. Mack

6 Signs You're Meant To Have A Big Age Gap Between Kids

There's a five year age difference between my two children, to the day. Their age gap wasn't planned but, for a variety of reasons, works well for our family. And since I was so focused on having a second baby, I totally overlooked the signs that wou…
By Candace Ganger

My Dog Knew I Was Pregnant Before My Family Did

Growing up, I was 100 percent sure I'd be a mom one day. To a dog, that is. My baby plans came later. And once my husband and I were sure we wanted both a dog and a baby, we'd add to our joint dog-and-baby name list over Sunday brunch or on date nigh…
By Melissa Mills