You've probably seen more than a few serene photos of new moms cradling, or sleeping soundly next to, their babies. Those moms usually have big breasts and flat stomachs, and never have stains on their whites clothes or white bed sheets. Their babies are almost always either sleeping, nursing, or laughing. These new moms look perfect, happy, and like they love every minute of parenthood because they are new moms, and that's what new moms are supposed to do, right? Our culture loves this "brand" of woman to the point that society actually fetishizes new moms and, well, it totally needs to stop.
Now, I am not saying that I hate being a new mom. I freaking love the fourth trimester for the snuggles alone. However, when society places new moms on a pedestal, it sets the bar so high that those of us with crying babies, chubby tummies, stains on our shirts, and experiencing moments when we don't love motherhood, can't possibly reach it. We are left thinking there must be something wrong with us. So we try to be perfect, or at least appear to be perfect on social media, and ultimately fail, because no mom is perfect all of the time and new moms almost always have stains on their shirts (or maybe that's just me).
Add postpartum depression, difficulties breastfeeding, deciding to go back to work, not buying 100 percent organic food, not losing the "baby weight" right away, and all of the other ways that you can fail at being a "perfect" mother every day, and you really start to feel like you're doing it wrong. The truth, though? You're not. You're not failing or doing anything wrong. The picture us new moms are trying emulate is a lie created by a society that fetishizes a version of new motherhood that doesn't actually exists. As a result of this idealization of new moms, society also hurts dads, people struggling with loss or infertility, and women who dare to be child-free by choice. So with that in mind, here's a few more reasons why society needs to just knock it the hell off: