Love is a many splendored thing, but you know what isn’t? Breaking up. Breakups are tough. As parents, we know this undeniable fact all too well. Most of us have experienced a number of relationships, so we've experienced heartache and anguish, unrequited love and two people growing apart. Our kids, however, don’t have nearly the kind of life experience we do, so they see relationships differently and love differently. As a result, the kind of breakup advice kids give is basically all over the place. Some of their tips are on the nose, but others are, frankly, just hilarious.
I asked my own kid what kind of advice he would give someone if they broke up with someone else, and his answer was surprisingly profound. He said, “Work. They should just work." And his answer was said in a way that implied I was ridiculous for even asking a question with such an obvious answer. Shouldn't I, and everybody else, know this already? The kid is wise beyond his years, I tell you.
It’s been quite a while since my last breakup, though, so I asked a few other kids to share their solid breakup advice. From ages 4 through 15, the responses range from ghosting to elaborate smear campaigns (you’ll get the double-entendre later). If you’re currently in the depths of heartbreak, see if you don’t find some wisdom (or at least some laughs) in the following responses: